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A final letter I'll write,
For everyone to read,
For when I'm gone,
I will no longer impede.

A gun to the head would work,
But then so would a noose -
Tie it, hang it, and leave it for later.
Oh no, this is too loose.

I wish I could unsee it,
I wish I could unhear it,
I wish it never happened -
And I don't want to believe it.

Talking to her,
It's all a blur ,
For during every session,
I weep through her slurs.

I have been debased,
I have been misplaced,
And every time I see her face -
I feel like an absolute.

Disgrace.
They’ll check your wrists,
But not your thighs,
They’ll check your smile,
But not your eyes
They’ll avoid the truth,
Believe the lies,
Nothing to sooth,
No reason to cry,
Our smiles are bright,
Eyes are a bit dull,
Wrists are clean despite,
The blade with an emotional pull,
And we’re emotionally unstable,
But they say that’s okay,
We are all a bit of a riddle,
But that’s the only thing we can convey,
And the world will open to swallow us up,
But that’s okay, at least our habits remain,
And when their arms finally open up,
We will show them the reflection they taught us to shame,
So we paint a smile with the color of red,
From the thighs they didn’t check,
And from our eyes we bled.
And they'll only understand,
When the noose hold us by our necks,
And if they had thought twice,

Maybe our eyes they would have checked.
I’m not heartless, I just learned how to use my heart less
|“lead into gold, good into dear, mortal into immortal”
(where poems come from)”
|


you charged me
with crimes three times three,
sorcery and witchcraft and doing god’s work

plead guilty three times three
not that I was successful,
but a complex, candied marvelous failure

not in my possession, the sorcerers spell,
my dross and wordy dregs all sit sidelined,
perchance perhaps,
if you search with a leaden patience inhuman,
you might just find a minuscule golden vein there’d unmined

turning good into dear, an “anyone can do it” miracle,
when you whisper with just one kiss those forever words,
don’t be afraid, say it low and slow, I love you,
and
“I only want to be with you”
and dare it to be become dear

mortal into immortal, an order tall, for one knows his
hiding places for all too human pockmarked weak,
but having been charged and found in guilt,
no one proffered evidence but they wanted a unambiguous
unanimous verdict and proof is such an old fashioned truth notion

happy accept your accusations and since confession is
the best soul medicine, with glee, here and now reveal
how immortality is achievable


breathe poems  constantly instantly throughout
the orifices in the skin cells and
pore’d orifices you were god given;
it is how we immortals communicate
with what cannot be seen,
yet drunken heard when spoke aloud

taste the poems in and on tongues you can’t comprehend,
the sounds fly skyward after infiltrating your eyes,
then you can see your own immortality anointed rising

all nonsense you plead,
indeed,
only immortals truly cherish and envy the
human ability to create
nonsense, the place
where poems come from

*******
"What do you really want?"

I was embarrassed to respond emptily

"What does your soul pray for?"

To finally admit I'm of air

It's all show and no well

You cant dive in me

Im ankle deep
The rose
May have petals
Soft as silk
Might be luxurious
And pure like milk.

Full of beauty
Full of love
Might look weak
But it is tough.

You forget
About its thorns
And you forget
What they’ve sworn:

“Evil and lust,
Hate and less trust.
Love is no good
When life is broken,
Like it should.”

The rose’s beauty
Isn’t real.
The rose’s hate it.
A poem I think I wrote in May of 2014, but I found it and recently revised it. It’s about my heart, as it broke the day I went into foster care. I used the rose because it as the last flower I saw when I left, and the first flower I saw when I arrived at my new home.
You talked about the hours
I know what you mean
Two cocoons spinning around each other
Waiting to be born

Nothing personal was the agreement
After awhile

It gets lonely
With nothing else to do but be inside

Not wanting to hide
Or collide
Do we really have that much time?

Two cocoons spinning
You became a butterfly
I became a moth
You flew west
I flew north.
The title is one of my favorite Bob Dylan lines from Your Going to Make Me Lonesome When You Go...
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