I just want my smile back
Now it's stuck in pictures and glass jars
owned by people I no longer care for.
Every day is dimmer than the last.
You took my eyes and turned them black and grey
in a world full of colors I'm no longer able to see.
You took something very valuable from me.

Mommy why, i was just barely opening my heart to  you
Mommy you see me through the screen beating my life to you
120 beats per second ,faster than your heart mommy.
Mommy, I feel your smile broaden
Mommy I will love you conditionally
Moommyy what is this clamp mommy ,
please don't it hurts it hurts please mommy
Seven Weeks , Three Days Pregnant

I lost you my precious , Words will never define the darkness I feel in my heart . The darkness of how unloving my heart became, How heartless humanity was around me like infectious leech. Letting you go was the consequences of the bite. Please forgive me,  I made the biggest mistake in my life. The one mistake, where you won't grow up to learn from. What was left of my heart became stone cold , I let go my true shot of happiness, but I couldn't bring you into a world of brokenness and despair. You deserve better, but better than you will ever receive from me. One day I hope you understand. I promise you , my love lies deep in my veins.  I love you ,Heaven needed you back and I regret not standing like warrior and fighting for you. I never will wash dirt on my back,I can never stop apologizing for the vicious attacks you endured by me . Every sunrise and sunset I will forever mourn the death of my own humanity against you.
*One last breath,Mommy, I love you Forever
I'll float down the river ,patiently waiting for ocean to wash me into abyss , humming to the lullaby,I would have sang to you my precious gift.

Sense of energy,   shoots right through
                                                you
leaves you numb,      rots your brain
                                       of pleasure,
leaves you breathless,     contagious
                                                  ****** cigarettes,
                      pressed against your chest

         stained,         dyed fingertips
                               nicotine in your creases,
         from her,
                      essence

            Jolts through your brain,
                      never missing a neuropath way ,
that look,                              gives it away

Engulf it,
                 absorb it,
             Extend/Expand/Divide

I almost saw the stars,
Jupiter, Venus and Mars.
But you stole my wings from me,
And replaced them with a cheep plastic mockery.
I ran away tonight,
Ran from the dull city lights.
I ran away in the rain,
hoping it would wash away my pain.
But the dark was lonely,
It didn't consume me.
Maybe I'll have better luck next time,
Maybe I'll come up with a better rhyme.

(My Love,)
If you could see yourself when I touch your face
You'd be familiar with the echo
The expressions come when you close your eyes
Your need to be loved
                      Your need to be accepted
Your craving needs for my affection
You're beautiful
               You're vulnerable
                             You're the blushing of your cheeks
                                        Desiring me to love you
                Kissing the redness of your lips
The heat of your hands
          Telling me you are mine
                    And mine alone to touch
    We are one in the darkness of where we stand
      Time sits still when I see your waking eyes
              Glittering as gorgeous as they are
     Oh the lightness of a smile staring back at me
Obliterated sadness  Now it's gone without a trace
              In these moments you are all I see
                                                             ­      (Your Love.)