I suspect,
that my essence
was never meant
for such love.
all along,
all alone.

and thus I remain.

Sometimes I wonder
Why can't you change
Why are you the way you are
The size
Height
Weight
Even what's on the inside
Can't you change
To fit my wants and needs
I should know what's best for me
Right?
You gave me a brain
To make that decision
Right?
If I hurt you
It's for a reason
And the reason is your fault
For not making me as pretty
As I am on the inside
Or not giving me the weight
That goes with my height
That you also chose for me
A letter
To my body
I hate you.

i feel the pain of judgement,
i feel the burning eyes of the "normals",
i feel abandoned,
i feel as if no one likes me,
as if I just don't belong,
i have a few friends and that's all,
i'm the "******",
homeschooled and apparently homeschoolers have no friends,
that's what they all think,
i miss my home,
my friends,
my old life,
i hate technology sometimes!
it's a wall between real people,
even with "friends" people are on their phones talking to people they aren't with!
they don't talk with the people that are standing right there!!
why can't this generation be different?
why can't we all just talk,
really,
really talk,
i want this so badly,
i've been on the outside for so long,
and it's because people are scared,
and stupid,
they can't see what's right in their face,
they can't see that i'm hurting alone,
alone with my hurting soul.