A constant battle rages.
Hot and cold circle each other in an elegant dance.
Decay feeds the blooming field above.
The sun and moon compete for our attention.

Inside, a wrathful hurricane thrashes against my skull.
Inside, the elements clash against my ribs.
Inside, the gravity of death and the lift of life rip my heart in half.
Inside, I don't know what to choose.

Heaven and Hell continue their war inside of me
     and all around me.
They whisper to me the wrongs and rights of the world
     but they tell me lies.
I close my eyes tight and clamp my hands over my ears
     but they still find me.

I do not feel serenity in the natural balance of life.

I feel confused
          I feel blurred
                    I feel chaotic

With the pressure to choose.

                                           I cannot choose.
                                   What if I choose wrong?
               How do I choose who gets to hurt
                                                            and who gets joy?
But I do it all the time.

I choose to hurt.
So they can feel joy.
But I don't want it anymore.
What will happen to the scale if I decide to jump

     into the river
          so far below,
     into the clouds
          so welcoming,
     into the fire
          so destructive
     into the ground
          so cold underneath.

How will I find balance within me
     if I cannot find peace in the balance around me?