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basil May 25
you complain about how people
can hardly see the difference between your pupil and your iris,
because your eyes are so dark
but i love the way
i can see my reflection smiling after your lips turn up

you call me hot, babe, honey
i call you ******, loser, simp

you have to leave me in two months
when your future catches up to you
but i'm the one with 'goodbye' hovering on my tongue

i'm trying to make up for three months of love poems
that i couldn't bring myself to write
but i can feel my bitterness leaking through

i can’t immortalize you now that i can count the days until you leave me on one hand

and you tell me horrible things like
“i’ll wait for you” and you say terrible words like
“i promise” and i cant seem to do anything but cry and need you

consider this my goodbye
it’s the only one i can bear to give
******* for making me love u when you knew you had to leave me. i’m going to miss you so much.

i cant even blame u cuz you have this whole future calling for u. i just love u

05.25.2022
Taoist Monk Apr 2
I exist at a depth, beyond wallowing and sorrow
Where No emotion could reach, except love
But love has betrayed me, love
has left me strewn and sown;
Haphazardly, irretrievably, sown

I stand now, not broken.. unfixed,
Unhinged.. from pain, from grief
Removed from tears, my heart; a sieve
that is unwanted by love, undesired by it.
Though it dwells in me it spares me no thought.

Though I have reached out,
I am held down like Atlas
The tension is unbearable, tearing;
at the self-inflicted knots, caverns of solitude
Pits of loneliness

Left unsaid, is the hurt
Gnawing at the pillars that once held,
carried the burning torch that lit up my soul
I am undone, I am alone.. I am alone
#singleforever lol
basil Jan 4
<3
you gave me the first feelings that i don't have words for
01.03.2021
basil Dec 2021
;)
we both got sweatshirts for christmas
i hope we can trade sometime
i have been diagnosed with simp

12.26.2021
I miss your eyes on me,
And I can’t sleep,
Your voice in my head,
Unable to think,
The mist and the tears,
I can’t decipher between;
And another glass sits empty.

I’m blank of meaning
Without any ideas to say,
Just tell me if I’ve been pushed
From your mind already
Because the silence
Has taken me to an asylum,

And when I yell to the breeze against my face
Barely alive and disregarding speed limits,
I wonder if the lyrics I speak
Tear you to pieces
As they do me,
Since they speak truth better than my own.

When did you forget me?
It’s degrading to only know
By feeling,
And not by telling.
I can taste the sulfur
In the air tonight.

Why didn’t you warn me?
30 lines, 258 days left.
Claire Billings Feb 2021
A simple glance causing colors to dance
upon my pale cheeks

Your smile and wit full of nonchalance
leaving me stumbling for an adequate response,

to fully express the way I feel

But alas I'm left tongue-tied because I'm head over heels
I barely know you yet you fill my head constantly
Claire Billings Feb 2021
I'd let you tear my heart out
step on it and toss it away
and light the remains on fire
if it means you'd be there to ignite me with a kiss
and use your touch to cut my heart out in the first place
basil Feb 2021
i.
we both want to get rid of our last names.
maybe that was a sign.

ii.
we always talked about faking our deaths together
curled up on your couch when everyone was
sleeping. i hope you remember what my desperation
tasted like. at midnight i had to go.
like cinderella. but it was wintertime and the pumpkins
were moldy. you never came to my door with a shoe or a question.
maybe that was a sign.

iii.
you chased after her when i was sitting patiently at your feet.
she was joking about an anime i hadn't watched
and you got mad. the joking mad that makes you laugh until
you're red. the way you never got with me. maybe
scared that i'd run. the way you did after her. i know i shouldn't be
jealous, but.
maybe that was a sign.

iv.
i asked you what flavour i would be and you said
raspberry. i never tasted them the same again. you didn't ask me
to tell  you which you'd be, but i told you mango anyway.
who ever heard of a raspberry mango smoothie? one day i
made one. just to see what we tasted like. i could only pick out the
raspberries.
maybe that was a sign.

v.
you got a tarot reading from someone else. i tried not to be hurt, but you never wanted one from me. i was too cut up to ever
ask you why.
you told me what your cards said, and none of them were about me. i guess it's selfish.
but mine are always about you. god, do you even know
how much you break me? i must be addicted to it
because i stay. i stay and stay and stay
even when you get another tarot reading from her.
maybe that was a sign.

vi.
i always texted first. always.
maybe that was a sign.

vii.
i'm the one writing all these poems about you. like we're broken up. you never said the words, and neither did i.
but i'll never forget what the moon told me late that night
when you didn't linger at my door. half past midnight.
i try not to read too much into it, but.
maybe it was a sign.
i'm an overthinking ***** :))

i love you blue eyes. please stop letting me write these stupid poems about you. it really doesn't do me any good.
GRAVE27 Jan 2021
I think it's been a long time
I think it's been a while
Since the memory and the vibe
The very first time you said hi

I was ready to forget you
But then I saw a photo of you in blue
In the place we used to go
Doing things we used to do

I was afraid to say this
I was terrified to admit that I miss
But now I can't hold myself back
I think I've fallen for you again
But I know it's different this time
2
AF Dec 2020
why don't you see that
he doesn't care about you;
if he did he would show you
how you changed his whole world
the moment he met you and
how you have been on his
mind every second since.
how when you smile his whole
heart melts and when you start
to dance like a maniac in front of
all your friends, all his worries disappear
because if there's someone as close to perfect
as you; why worry since there's clearly a
god out there that created you.
so why don't you see that he doesn't care,
why can't you just accept it and see that someone
right in front of you, already thinks the world of you.


- AF.
I guess I'm invisible
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