This is my secret confession
Where I lived a life of deception
Blinded as I was I chose not to see
That all I was courting was just pure controversy

You see I thought that I could juggle both fire and ice
When all I was balancing were just lies
They say I can't have my cake and eat it too
Greedy as I was I chose not to listen even if it was true

In the end I juggled both up high into the sky
Where they disappeared without a goodbye
Now I sit here all alone
All alone with my bag of methadone

she was a pretty little one
with her braid hair of yesteryears
in her eyes the mist of green forests
the await for a shinning armor

i got to keep her tainted clothes
in this confinement on death row

Can you guess
My hidden secret
Where in darkness
You will feel pain
But also pleasure
With a forbidden taboo
For nobody will know

I have a confession to make
And it won't be clear  
Or even wise for that matter  
But I was there  

My eyes saw what they saw
I knew they would tear    
And I swore it nothing new  
But no one was near

I saw what I saw
but now I am here
And yet I still wonder
If I'm ever really here  

I guess the skies
were never as clear
At least In this disguise
I am *sincere

Raindrops splatter
Tears that don't matter
Painting the pain on my skin
Words slice
And create a vice
That breaks the girl within
Thoughts swirl
Emotions whirl
Where can I begin?
Bones break
A heart that aches
Disguises that wear thin
Feeling wrong
Can't sing my song
Will never make up for my sin..

Not one
but both
no preference
too scared to go too far
curled into material happiness
too far gone to come back
awake but asleep
until morning
and even then
alone again

I've got a secret
Kept it hidden well
It's destroying my soul
And gonna send me to hell
But I like how it feels
I love how it tastes
It's fun and invigorating
When I'm testing my fate
It boggles my mind
And clouds my eyes
Helps me become numb
And stops all the cries
I can smell the memories
Fading out of my life
With every pop, snort
And brand new knife

this past summer he took it from me
i didn't even realize it was something i wanted to lose
it was nothing like what i read in books
because i know those characters did not bruise
he was so sweet before i agreed to it
i genuinely thought the he cared for me
but i guess he just played me like i tried to play him
he promised it would help set me free
so i lost it, i gave into his sweet words
his purring and alluring speeches
in school they make you swear to say no
what to do when you say yes, is something no one teaches
so he took it because i let him
and i did not even begin to cry
it's not like he stole it from me
but thinking he would return it, that's a lie