There's a way in which I break for beauties like you. It's a performance piece, not of the egoistic sort, but rather a birthed love-child of servility and altruism. Here's my recipe, if you ever wanted to scrutinise my path to death.

First, i stare. And marvel in awe at the carved beauty of you and wonder how many cities you've inspired.

Second is initiation. A delicate dance to either be executed from a carnal desire or a romantic want. I choose one or another, seldom do I pick both; tho they end the same way.  

Third is the burning period. I will saturate myself with unwarranted loyalty at this point. I morph to their warmth and this is where it gets sick.        

Fourth: obsession. If you look into my eyes you will see a longing to drown and to go back to the ocean that is you. It's potent enough to drive me insane. Consuming.

Fifth, i surrender. I'd ask you to take off that fire. I want you to still exist but to go burn somewhere else. To be a forest-fire that inspires rather than to maim me insolently.

Sixth is penance dressed masochistically. I torture myself for reasons he wouldn't understand or is justified, but I somehow think it's salubrious.

Seventh concerns with the cycle of death. I die for you, over and over again. I choose to do this.

Eighth is where my pain becomes stagnant and transition into ghosts with names.

Ninth better itself to be the point of moving on and building graves on reverence for even having a taste of perfection.

Tenth, I repeat this whole process.

I remember shooting up in the alley between the old library and the church it wasn't poetic, it was a fix and nothing more.

I remember meeting Jesus and asking him why he was so full of ****?
Why cities burned and madmen killed?

He said it wasn't his problem.
The devil cried and was cast away for his tears.

The gun had become truth and the lies had become gospel.
The junkies became a test subject for the futures asylums residents.

I laid down feeling the cold of the street and the warmth of the fix.

I asked for a reason and the ******* gave none he just asked me to share what I could not control.

Why? is not a question for life
simply duck your head and follow
Follow to marriage, follow to war, follow to death.

**** without question and feed the lost vice.

I never spoke to him again but I never would be ever that person who shot up again either.

I didn't need pages to guide me.
As I write my own answers I ask no guidance from empty skies.

Maybe their anger will keep me warm.

But maybe it wasn't my problem to begin with.

Tonight, I feel lucky like I got Lamia at my side
Twilight will see justice and wrath meet
From virulence who could truly hide?
Tonight I ride in under the rain,
like under thin skin pushing blade
Anguish within replete in collecting like a memory
In time fully bleeding and reaping
A time limit on sun and moonlight
Tonight I ride in delivery
of thousands
hurting
for pain in payment

My mother was not right since the longest I recall
with the sickness to which you bound her, enthralled
For the daughters and the sons and for guardians who once
enjoyed their unity, who well beside themselves with grief
won't ever pray for harm

Tonight I ride lucky, Lamia,
as I collide

My remedy,

My penance,

My salvation,

Rests on your smile.