i know you don’t want to be with me,
please stop with the i love you’s,
you don't even know what that means
do you really think that I'm a fool
i cant make the person that i once loved be in a relationship that i only dream of.
so I decided for myself to not have you around
so why are you threatening me
being so hateful and mean
telling me this will get ugly
why are you being like this
what do you mean,
I hate that your deceitful
dishonest and untrustworthy,
a two-faced LYING **** thats
forcing them selfs in my life
I'm really trying to understand
how you could be so selfish  
you just break my heart over and over again,
its better that your very far you see,
cause having you around just hurts me,
what don't you understand.
i don't want you around me
i don't want to be your friend,
and moments that i think of you
i start to remember how you treated me
with no respect you've given me
you always would get rid of me,
please oh please just let me be free

I like to say “Goodnight” aloud,
Every night,
Before I go to sleep
(When I remember).

Not for myself, of course,
But for anyone,
Or anything,
That might be listening.

Not to God,
If that’s what you’re thinking,
Though I am open
To the possibility.

But rather,
To the demons of my day;
My little fears and regrets,
So that they might shut up,

And leave my dreams the **** alone.

If he knew the amount of power
He still holds over my fragile existence
He'd rise to dictator status
Because that's what he is to me
I'm like a Jew  in love with ******
Being sent off to the showers
I suffocate on the memory of promise
If he knew how often I think of him
He wouldn't know what to do
He'd be giddy and not the least bit afraid
Because I have a monopoly on fear
When it comes to that Peter Pan
A boy child never to turn man
If he knew the feelings I still harbor
But dare not to confess
He would abuse that power profusely
Because knowledge is the web
I'm eternally trapped in
I'm not a *******
But I still adore
That sadist