I never lost my virginity
At the age of 19
To a boy who promised
That it will not hurt
I never bled
I never bit my lips
I never cried

I never slept with a writer,
Musician, chemist,
An engineer or even a *******
I never tried a pregnancy test kit
I am not scared
Of those two red lines

I never loved my best friend
Or those strangers
Who painfully ripped my body
I love those stains
Of a long forgotten past
Embedded on crumpled sheets  

I was never molested
When I was 5 or so
It was just a game
I never cursed that night
I never hated my brother

I want men to crave for me
I never wanted their affection
I don’t want to ******* **** them
On streets in the middle of the night
With cat calls

I am not depressed
I love my scars
I never took ******
Just to sleep at night
Or wept in the middle of nowhere

I am a strong woman
I am not damaged
I ******* hate this life
It’s too beautiful for someone like me  

This is not a poem
Of a broken girl
I am okay.
I wanna live.
I am not a liar.

A happy girl
Wrote this
Waiting for her prince charming
To free this damsel in distress
From the tower of anguish
And to live happily ever after

I don't want you
Any part of your noxious soul
You *******, obliterate, destroy
Like venom in veins
Slowly eat away
Look at the pain
You caused so much
Broken hearts, twisted remarks
Undone, redone to undo again
Your ways make absolutely no ******* sense
****** sensations
My only limitation
But insanity comes with a heavy price
Now nothing ever seems to suffice
Normal conversation is all that was required
Of course, too much to ask, from a lowly squire
Everything you touch turns to ash
If it weren't for compassion I would've never acted so rash
But now that's all trash
You've proven your worth
Correct, none
I want all my doings to be undone
**** your tainted mind
How do I leave this **** behind


                                                 *s.q.