Let me be alone,

I do like it and get bored --


when in company.

She just watches it

with indifference, smiling --


irritatingly.

Something shiny there,

I stop and kick it away --


pff, just a dead star.

I dropped out of college one month in.

I quit two jobs over text.

I only retrieved half of my belongings after moving out of my parents house.

My library card was cancelled because I never returned the DVD I rented, because I never watched it.

My exes all still have at least two articles of my clothing because I told them I'd come get them. I intended to. I just never got around to it.

I started to write a suicide note.
I just never knew how to
end
it.

They badgered me, berated me.
They beat me and they hated me.
They seemed to want me to die
Too soon, then, so did I.

I was different, and that was the reason.
Too many saw that as a form of treason.

I had to adhere to the boundaries
That were set for us artificially
They had no reference to reality;
More to some kind of elite tyranny.

And, I still find it horribly strange
That very little has changed.
The rules are still very much
Incredibly socially out of touch.

Strive to be elite or be beaten
And ultimately, almost literally eaten
By the swarm of mindless fools
That go on defending the rules  

That allow children to be thugs
And, come to school to sell drugs;
That let the criminals escape
And, turn a blind eye to ****
And abuse and battering
But keep the ******* clattering
At PTA, school board and council meetings  
More concerned with politics
Than the real-time subjects
Such as kids afraid of attending
Because the battlefield is never ending.

All the veins,
arteries and trains
from here to there
are way not near
enough route
for you to commute
to come to me,
or for me
to be
close to you.