time's up
the clock is ticking,
your breath is quickening,
your eyes are blurred and the light in your eyes is hidden,
behind a mask of happiness you know isn't true,
but you keep it all inside,
with your heart clawing to be free,
and your head, it's pounding thoughts a million at once.

but you promised yourself to be okay,
even if pretending was not.

-jhené.a.

Not long before you came around,
An empty heart and lost soul were found.
He who stood where you do now,
Our hearts and souls that took a vow.
Our given trust, our emotions ran deep,
A quickened clock, rushed to weep.
Then came time to speak the mind,
Looking for words I could not find.
Before your breath could unveil the truth,
Before my heart held its proof,
Words were spoken in my ear,
Heart wrenching words I’d always feared.
With heavy limbs, cheeks soaked and red,
Air meaningless, life was dead.
Like the few others who came before,
The ones who just walked out the door,
Its strength and power held within,
That picks one up to start again.
As strength grows, the heart soon finding,
Where you stand now, two hearts binding.
Forgetting scars I once knew,
Every time that I’m with you,
Like an open book you read so well,
Reading page after page you can always tell.
Like the words are written on my face,
All those worries, gone, without a trace.
Time now passes, weeks go by,
Remembering that incredible Fourth of July,
No matter the time, no matter the day,
My feelings for you could never be pushed away.
The more days past the more I knew,
I would never again, meet anyone quite like you.
Butterflies in my stomach I couldn’t believe,
That months would go, yet, I still perceived,
That you still felt the way you did,
On that fourth when all fears hid.
But...
Without a warning, no doubt at all
You took a step back, you shielded you wall
From your actions, my heart plundered
The more time passed, the more I wondered.
Where you went, and why you shut down.
Why the hell were you not around.
All I saw was an empty shell
Thoughts of the past, you couldn’t dispel.
Put in a place you didn’t belong
Finally a decision you could no longer prolong.
Two years pushed you, broke you down inside
Two years taken, that you couldn’t rewind.
Past all the feelings, in the back of my mind,
Remembering why, I let my heart become blind.
Being reminded as time passed,
Knowing what we have, might not last.
Ticking time hit the clock,
I cannot run, I cannot walk,
Away from time which haunts me so.
Away from heartache, I’ve come to know.
Every moment spent with you,
Another memory I won’t undo.
I’ve grown so close, in fact too much,
Close to something I cannot touch.
They pass again, the hands of time,
And I hate the way there is no rhyme,
No rhyme, no reason, I’m left behind.
Praying… wanting time to just rewind.
Watching you leave, my heart feels death
Feeling our last kiss, our final breaths.
Keep in your mind, always know
That is was time, that let us grow
That is wasn’t long before you came around,
It was my heart and soul that you found.
No one can stand where you do now,
Because my heart and soul took a vow.
A given trust, emotions ran deep,
These are words to remember, words to keep.
<3   <3   <3   <3   <3
Time let me see, something I felt… something I already knew
The moment you walked away, I realized just how much…
I truly loved you.