Our love was nothing
more than faded letters
kept in a drawer,
eating dust to survive.
We pretended it died
out of famine
as we discreetly moved on
free of guilt.


But...


I still have the scars
hidden under my sleeves;
begging for attention,
like a kid in the aisle
of a candy store,
eyeing a bottle of gummy bears
and a pack of Reeses.


What is there to miss?


I don't even know
the curve of your smile
when you said a cryptic 'hi'
almost a month ago.
When you pulled me close-
but not too close
because you were afraid of love
more than losing it.


Our hands
weren't made
to touch;
a curve and an asymptote
always r e a c h i n g,
a depressed biology
of 'crown shyness'
moving from trees
to human fingertips.


And so i
planned to leave...


only to see
your addio note
and spare keys
sitting comfortably
on the breakfast table,
having a pep talk
with a cup of cold coffee
and a stale egg omelette.


You won
in our race
to goodbye.

The depth of love
Cannot extend to those hidden
Under waves of resentment

they won’t miss me
she whispers as she pours
another pill in her hand

they won’t miss me
he mutters as he ties the
knot of the rope that will
be his end

they won’t miss me
she laughs ironically as
she loads the gun

they won’t miss me
he sighs as he picks up
the knife

i wish it didn’t have to be like this
they all cry

but now
it’s too late
the pills gone
the rope knotted
the gun loaded
and
the knife stained.

picture the pieces of yourself
that you spent hours picking apart
for every flaw and imperfection
for every blemish, every mark.

double them as plasters,
band-aids stuck to shield the wounds
made by your mistakes,
by your infractions.

they weren't good enough.
sticking to your skin
like leaves off branches,
baring crimson and flesh torn open.

Running past
city lights
A silent cry
it’s your design
Winter’s grasp
a heart confined
The lonely pain
that haunts
my mind
****** tears fall
from my eyes
Melting dense
walls of ice
Around my heart
it’s yours tonight
Resurrected
under moonlight

I was the Sun,
For I shone by myself,
brightly.

You were the Moon,
For you eclipsed
My brightness.

I have a badge, an official hat
I know the law, but have no heart
Run your best, I am in uniform
In this attire, my integrity is deformed.

I have a shield, Sirens and gun
I love your chains, I hate your guts
In your best days, your innocence is guilt
Even in your grace, all I see is filth.

You take me as your saviour
Well, I can't, I have lost that savour
My evils shine night and in daylight
In 9 minutes, my protection will take your life.

Your 'I can't breathe' we only give you a grave
Be still, it is televised, you will enjoy the rave
I don't war alone, my demons are with me
You are not alone, there have been and there will always be.

You can call me names, but the deal is done
You can agitate all day, what next when all is said and done?
You can chain me, there are millions with my mind
It is not a war for the street, it is a war of the mind.