I still remember
The Nights I prayed,
A prayer born from despair.
I still recall
The Tear that trickled,
Deemed to go nowhere.
The many fears I held inside
That seemed to keep me from
The Light-
broken inside-and no one seemed
To know.

I look back
Upon my Life,
How did I end up here?
This Soul of mine
To privately,
Hidden my despair-
Those days gone by
To no prevail,
I  believed but Loves betrayal,
All was but LOst
All to only me.

So
Lift my Heart and Soul,
Where  this journey go.
Give me the strength to know,
For what I reap I"ll sow-
Oh oh

I never knew-but now i truely know.

Time races by
Each day I try,
To find my inner child-
To hold his hand
And silently,
Whisper:Its alright.
I walked this Life
Too many chains,
Bound within my side-
The Past its grip
Forever in my eye.

So
Lift my Heart and Soul,
Where this journey go.
Give me the strength to know,
For what I reap I"ll sow-
Oh oh

I never knew-but now i truely know.

So
Lift my Heart and Soul,
Does anybody know?
What may be fall me yet?
For what You ask you"ll get-
Oh oh

I never knew-but now I truely know

And so

Oh oh

I never knew-but now I truely know.....

You asked me why I like you
But I didn’t want to tell
Some of my reasons are cheesy...
But here is why I fell

I love the way your lips curve
When I make you smile
It makes me want to pull you close
And kiss you for awhile

I love the way your eyes twinkle
When you talk about things you love
I truely believe
You are a gift from above

I love that you are compassionate
You have such a big heart
That was the first thing I noticed
Right from the start

I love the way it feels
When you hold me tight
I finally feel safe
Like I could sleep through the night

I love that you don’t judge me
For my less than perfect self
That is more attractive
Than any amount of wealth

There are so many more reasons
But I’ll start with just this few
Maybe someday
I’ll give this poem to you

:)

We sit in the middle of the the universe. Truely. ?

The earth is flat .the horizon.
Falls away to oblivion TRUELY.  ?

If man was meant to fly he.would sprout wings.
REALLY?

My god is the real god.
TRUELY. ?

Freedom is. For free

Really ?.                                                The meek shall inherit the earth.
                  
    


                                      Still reading the ticker tape on that.
                                                             One.

Absolute power corrupts. Absolutly
Absolutly !!!!! .

Will a bear **** in the woods?
Probably !.                                                     Is this poem going anywhere?
                                                                      Nahh.
Just a goof.

My big headed people said ity, i trusted, 'hiriz' has never dissapointed themy,
my hatred for non conformity, enormous, i surely hated the conformity truly,
i almost lost it for 'hiriz' sakey, **** it, ill never have wanted to lose this beauty,

i had it  weirdly thinking ablazey, loozing?, no, i hadnt  and  you n they didnt realize fastly,
loosing soo fast  about  lowly sinking sinly,curse all day i ,ever had thee meeting to lyfy,
wit all the  a vitue TRUELY INVESTMENT **** no lievly, forget me darl; once and  for ever dony

one more what you  waznyt quetly, cool openly, man must lively sweetly
that a day woud spoily truely, madly mey, sooooooo losty i had made a choisy,
refusing my being theiyyyyy, lucky  me doing, buty,  i love thater that am no longy

your timey was wanting by virtuey,  truey. luck **** spyty this shiety oul
endy began truely sure truelly, fukciey, its thats badyy, me lost it shortlley
man must livevy or diiey, truely, gotta  ity, man look for bread i wannaity


withought even hiriz it all worked welly, herey,  i am.  fu** like ity
dead

Have you ever
Said hi to the one
Who supposedly
Said I am in love with you
To your face.
Now they wont give you
The time of day

Why couldnt you
Just say
I want to remain friends
Instead I waited
No word
You kept on in your life
But left me behind
I thought you loved me
I thought you cared
But it turns out
I got the cold shoulder
You turned your back
And walked away

What did I do?
Answer me that
Did I hurt you...
Cause if I did
I am truely sorry
I hope you can forgive me
One day

All I have to go by
Is your silence.
So until you
Can turn and face me
You will never know
What it is like to be
Truely Alone.

Pity
I truely hate that word
Its so weak
So absurd
You can grovel all you want about your neglect
Or you can shut the hell up
And earn some respect

Loyalty...what exactly does being loyal entail? Well that is hard to put into words.
Some may say that being loyal means "down to ride " or even "Iwill never cheat " . Its easy to be loyal when what your being loyal to is at lifes mountain top...
   To me real true loyaltycomes when you see some one at there worst and/or lowest point. And you still stand tall by there side .loyalty is being there  when no one else will or even wants to be .loyalty is seeing helplessness and hopelessness and embracing it as a oppurtunity  to give a hand up instead of a kick down .
   Its loving some one the same amount wether its the superbowl or the tolietbowl .loyalty to me just comes naturally and is the absolute right thing to do. It means no matter what happens they know they have you.
    Loyalty is the foundation on which every relationship and friendship is built around . With out loyalty life is meaningless and feels as fake and lonely  as it .
   Loyalty at times can be hurting even withering but at that exact time be rewarding ..loyalty is shown at lifes highs n lows ,in all shapes and forms
..so in life if you can find another person that can be truely and honestly  loyal back to you ..it gives you the sense  that it was all worth it ..
We all need that one person. That no matter which of lifes path you journey either up or down wrong or right ..you know unquestionably  will with out doubt be there for you and when you see that the road traveled leads you to a dead end you have  them to point you  in a new direction

I put her in this book
I write her down as "Z"
Because I have a Beautiful
Little secret.

She's only made,
for me.

I got inside her heart
On that day I travelled
To this new Galaxy

But it's never been
Dark.

It's filled with...

Dreams
Goals
Aspirations

We have...

Destiny

I fall in-love again
every time I see her
Face, the smile she has
Can never be replaced

And when she just,
gets me my heart is
First in the race
Minds and Memories
Never erased.

From this whole book,
of what you are
And I hope to spread it...

Everyday

Together we've already
Created our own
Legacy

And when we use similar,
words like...

Jealousy
Envy

But we wouldn't mean
To do it on purpose

Only the purpose by
Fact not Chance
To show people,
the meaning of...

Truely Happy

So take my hand,
and walk with me.

And sometimes
The Way you look at me?
It takes my breath away

Sometimes I even.

Forget to breathe

And sometimes I'm lost
For words and I look and
Smile, reasons being
It's just to see yours...

If only for a while.

The way you push your
hair to the left to cover
Your face so nobody else
knows.

But it's the face I want
To hold and show people
Of what I have
The core of the earth

Stronger than Diamond

The Way I can pull you up
From the lowest of your lows.
With my hand in yours
It fits perfectly.

The way a kiss
Can make your whole day
And the way it speeds up mine
For the next time.

You know?

The Passion Of being there
I'll be your best friend and more
Hoping to open all the doors
And take a course

In You

The way we've made our promises
And the days we send pictures
To show the way
Where it's hard when We Leave
And the way I Miss You

But...

It's the way I Miss You
Feeling soo numb,
Has never been soo?

Familiar?

Can you imagine
Being in the desert with no water?
Being on the bungie with broken rope?
Being the kid with no hope?
Being in the darkest cave without light?
Two working eyes and no sight.

So now small parts of me
Are processed in ink,
cut deep within an put
On paper.

Because I feel?

Alive

I've got this case,
Of Love so put me trial
Give me the life sentence
You're definetly going
To be worth while.

all feeling are pieces of puzzle.
you see love is like a puzzle.
you try to find the right piece
to fit right spot.
if you break the woman
heart.from start you try to find
the right words  to say.sure
my man love is real
but at times.
got to have that game down
an them  ducky.
an walk that walk.
an talk that talk.
is part of this puzzle too.
on building that puzzle
of life .truely i'am not
a player at heart.
it would be nice
to have all the honey.
but i play to deferrent
tune in life. love is like
puzzle.some time it  fall apart
you have work at the  puzzle.
an find them right move
grip that woman
because she  have them keys
to your heart. this true
my man.the woman
have power of love
over a man heart.
but we  have to make that.
puzzle right.you see ?
so she is happy.we but
puzzle pieces in life.
think about this
puzzle.

On the good days, the words flutter around like butterflies waiting patiently to be choosen.  Other days, the dark uncertain times, they swarm you like hornets, stinging you over and over again.  Making the words fall from your eyes like tears splashing onto the page. You can avoid the whole thing,  by being normal, choose the hallmark life, pre-made and hollow love, never know mad love, never go crazy.  Live  the easy life, never risk anything, stay far far away from the edge.  If you want to call that living.  Bee bites and butterfly kisses, you can't just choose one, you have to live with them both.  The light wings of love and the swollen  eyes and hands from the stingers in your heart and soul... That's my life, the life I want at least... sleeping in the mouth of madness.  Somedays... it hurts, painful heart-wrenching hurt, Somedays its just so ******* beautiful all you do is weep at being alive to witness it.  Beautiful pain and heart breaking love... mad mad love.  How's that song go...

"You may be right
I may be crazy
But it just may be a lunatic you're looking for
Turn out the light
Don't try to save me"

Is that the stones...No Joel you say, so you've heard it... but did you really listen, down in your gut far down below your ears.  See that's one of the problems of the easy life, they don't teach you to listen, really listen where it matters.  Deep down in your dark belly full of demons and monsters and devils, where all the do is listen and if you let them... they turn it all into mad love to keep you alive, really alive.  Not that fake life so many people are so desperate to live.  Every one so ******  afraid of letting a little pain or misery into their lives, all just wanting to be "happy".  Never learning or realizing what they end up missing out on.  A miserable life, there's a secret to it that they won't share with you.  To be miserable, truely  miserable... you have to be touched at least once, just once, by mad crazy stark raving lunatic mad love.  You have to have danced in the mountains of madness for just a second.  And that single touch and that single moment of dancing there among the lunatics of love... that kind of love, never leaves you.  It shoots straight to the marrow of your bones, the bottom of your bottomless heart, soaks into the darkness in the depths of your soul.  It may not stay in your arms or your bed, it may not last as long as it promised or you wanted... but it never just flat out leaves you.  It stays... after every other fire burns out, after every star falls from the sky, after the moon and sun commit their last act of love for each other and both drink each others poison, when the whole of existence just "poofs" and dissappears... That mad love will still be there.  And all those lucky lunatics who went mad and loved crazy will have it all to themselves... MmmHmmm, nothing but that Madness and love.  What a god forsaken beautiful **** fest of an **** that's going to be... just madness and love free from all the other *******, going at it like a couple of teens who just discovered the ability to ******.  And misery knows it, misey hates it.  Because misery can bend you over in a dark alley and take you by force... but misery goes away at just the hope of love, in the presence of love its nothing more than a mist and a ghost.  It might whisper to you behind loves back... but never face to face with love.  Misery is one of the merchants peddling the easy life with the pre-made hollow love and ideal of a happy safe life far away from that scary forbidden edge.  Don't fall for it... find your reason to go mad, find your passenger to drive laughing over the edge with.  Embrace your lunatic and fill your heart and your life with that mad mad love.  Be your miserable ******* self to the core and bitter end... if you need me, you can find me at the mouth of madness, just listen, you'll hear me singing, horribly and off key and out of tune, you can hear me singing to the moon.  You may not belive it, I know it sounds crazy... but baby your the one that saved me.  I'll be waiting here in this mad mad love you gave me... nothing beautiful left in this life for me to do... Thank you... I hope you know I love you.