Hypothetical lust
Generated electrical impulses,
The very same that stirred your heart.

Pulse – stifled, still,
Cochlear arousal (still)
The same that heard "I love you"

Physically imprisoned,
We tremble from the pain
Yours in your mind, mine in my brain

Why do you always turn away
When I try to kiss your face?
And when I ask you what is wrong
Why do you stare off into space?

I look away and try to hide
To keep these feelings holed inside
I want to say I never lied
But long ago my feelings died.

Then when you're silent and you pause
Why do you laugh without a cause?
I guard my heart with teeth and claws,
But smile and laugh to hide my flaws

Why do you let me stay with you?
I forfeit credit where it's due
Why do you –* wait until I'm through
I cannot say I love you too.

You said We still have forever
What's a few more years apart
My trace of doubt, it left a wet line
down my cheek and neck and heart

You said Baby, this is nothing
when eternity is ours
But I saw that in your eyes
your tears were glistening like stars

You said Love will last forever
I am yours, so dry your eyes
Then you turned away and promised
These were not our last goodbyes

Overthinking.
I'm dwelling
on things that need not
more than five –
no, two
seconds.
Dismissed.

Spinning, looping
Repeating.
So unnecessarily lingering.
My mind is a bubble,
with a delicate membrane between my world
and sanity,
that houses liquid danger
Evaporated and pressing
outward against the walls
I constructed to keep others out,
and that instead poison me
with the toxic gas of these
Thoughts.

I stand out of sight.

Head bent, he checks an email
one step out of line,
easily corrected. Casually on his way
like he does it all the time.

Shameless, fearless,
head held high
Sweatpants and a purse, strange country
just passing by

I know you, and you know
my name. She is new to me
but you both look the same
then you disappear before I really see

Faces familiar and not
strangers, friends, people
Who do not see me watching.
I stay back, for I don't want to be seen.