Mama warned me countless of times
Never walk alone along the alley at night, "Call me or papa to pick you up"
I took it lightly, thinking it was just another preach-teach
If only I'd listened to her
If only I was stronger

I still walked lightly drunken down that alley that
horrible night,
a pure, broken white lamb limping down the street
just waiting for a black fox of the night to
come enrapture me,
take me away from everything,
as I stood, cold and uncomforted from the night's drunken stupor,
and crying.

As I keep on walking
His voice was still there
In my head screaming,
"You deserved this, shut up!
Wearing like a desperate ****!
Just let me taste you stupid ****!!!"
No matter how i screamed, his immense hands shrouding my mouth tightly.
The more i screamed, the more pain he puts me in.

A couple shoves,
a few bruises,
a yank,
and my silenced whimpers
as he ferociously goes in,
once, twice, too many times.
I'm trapped, heaving...
I should have listened to Mama...

Flashbacks ran through my head
How defiant I am towards my parents
How I always skipped anything physical, always judging girls on how they look.
It's happening to me now
I can do nothing but cry and give in
When he was done, he told me he'll **** my whole family if I tell the police.
I continue walking as my worth fading slowly.

And my fire burned out,
as I stopped struggling,
stopped making any noises,
and just lay still,
as he licked me and caressed me,
he's new found toy,
only to be tossed away later.

As I finally reached my nest,
I couldn't find the words to tell mama.
Not one person, not my boyfriend, not a soul. His face still haunts me every now and then.
He became this demon in my head
That will never go away.
It's been months now,
But this demon got my soul caged
And my lips zipped.
Not a single soul will ever know

Of our old times,
We sat there,
Under a tree,
With orange leaves,
We talked about love.

We held our hands,
Walked through the summer,
Smile the brightest,
Like the sunshine,
Our heart grew stronger.

Time is limit to us,
Day turns to night,
Which follows the nature rules,
Tick-a-toe of the fallen leaves,
Wishing the time could stop.

Today, I feel disappointed with some of my friends.
I feel very sad to the point I lost my way for a moment.
What should I do now? Should I just keep walking without way out?
This is really killing me.

designing n expressing…
a field I chose,
as there’s no right or wrong…
where one can sing
one’s own painted song…

surfing the waves of life
ignorant of my inner strife.
I flew on wings of dreams
till I chanced upon, one day
on the spiritual door, up stream

spirituality then happened to me.
I equally happened back to it.
ever since its been a love lore

all boundaries now diminished
like baby inside mother…
the ‘doer’ and the ‘doing’
the seeker and the sought
have merged into each other…

is there an ‘other’?

‘love’ and ‘spirituality’ to me,
are one n the same thing.
both facilitate the connect of self,
oh so deep within.

the door to immortality
both hold the key.
let the truth unfold
you don’t have to plea.

love is my breathing,
art my signature,
spirituality my anchoring,
absolute soul my true nature.

I'm in love with someone's daughter
living in the shards of a broken home
Cutting herself on two year-old letters
These are moments she can't fake;
reasons to feel alone
So used to abuse, her tears start to shake
I hold her close as her head starts to ache
"I love you too much,
so I can't let your heart break."
She said, "I know you love me,
but you've made a mistake."

I never meant for anyone to be my pulse.
I promise not to step on your feet
if you teach me how to waltz.