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He said those words
I can't
and my heart fell out of its pocket
like there was a hole in my
chest and
that very last stitch
heard him speak
Our mobius strip
lay suddenly flattened
- I on one side and
he on the reverse
like destiny and distance
were the same bridge to gap

Now I want life to end
as I lean down to hold
what's left in my lungs
- my final breath leaving as
I fall beyond the edge where
by some miracle
this leap of faith might save me
and I am captured by the arms
that wait beneath
- my fate finally showing its purpose
until the only strip that remains
is the one where
we remove each other's clothing
© Tamara Natividad
www.pisceanesque.com
Written 10 April, 2017
Thousands of bells chimed overhead
Their lovely tone shaping my thoughts
Splendid new lands danced in my sight
But with ten thousand bells as my guide
I would never be lost

Thousands of bells chimed from afar
Distant, soft, and gentle they seemed
Thousands of steps stretched between us
But with ten thousand bells at my side
I would never be lost

The steps grew larger, the land less great
My eyes more tired, my path less straight
The bells kept ringing, farther away
Too many to count, their sound now gray

They fall on deaf ears, heart turned aside
Waiting for someone, arms open wide
I have become lost, my own mistake
I went far from them, no path to take

Forever the bells will be gone
I do not know where to find them
For I thought not of their light
And I heard not what they sang
When the ten thousand bells rang
Always the same
Again
This cyclic life

Fuller than the sun, reaching further and yet its rays touch me merely for a second
Hidden by clouds
The dullest drizzle
For miles my sadness sounds

A different outfit everyday to cover the same dreary routine
The same feelings poisoning my being, brimming over till it spills
Spills over and never recedes
Like gloom grows, the day slows

Always the same
A race of worker bees we've become,
Ourselves to blame
We work to live but never live

Living for the future is to not live at all

Should I pass through the clouds this dawn I would never know you or this life

I'd never know consuming heartbreak
I'd never feel the unrelenting wrath of grief
The feeling of depthless love or shallow lust

I'm covered in clothes to hide my skin
My skin to hide my manifesting malaise
Sick of the same and the everlasting train with no seeming destination

If I jump will I see my dream
Or will I be lost, lost to this life
And it's damning merry-go round of everything acutely grey

I wonder as I try to find air
Are you the surface I can't reach,
Drowning so fast
It's as if I'm sinking
The shackles of society have tied my ankles to rocks
Drag down
Never to breathe
Never to see
Only to drown

Saccharine seconds relieve me temporarily but I can't ever feel free

There is no thirst and I have no reason to give you as to why I get up each morning
Get up just to see how far I am from feeling the sun still
It grinds me into the dirt and cripples my will

I want it to stop
Again
Never again
But I haven't the strength for mine to end

And so continues the heaves I breathe
And the darkness I see

Over and beginning again

K.G
Tell me why can't I just leave

— The End —