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  Aug 2018 Nemo W
Anonymous Freak
I moved my bed
To the other side of my room
To help my sleep,
To help me feel
Like that wasn’t where
I was violated.

You would think that in the months
That followed
After I truly understood
What he had done to me,
I would’ve run from the bed
It happened in.

But no.

I spent most of my time there.

I quit my job,
And slipped in and out of sleep
All day, every day.
I shut down.
I spent almost all of my time
In bed,
Letting my life
Pass me by,
Because I couldn’t stand
Participating anymore.

That corner of my room
Across from where I sleep
Still haunts me.

Thinking of what happened there,
About what happened there,
Makes me want to
Burn the sheets,
And peel off my skin,
Rip off the face he kissed,
And staple my legs closed.
So that no one,
No one,
Can ever do that to me again.

Thinking about what
He did to me
Makes me feel like I have to throw up,
And perhaps that would exile
The fear in my belly,
And banish the memories.

When I was a girl,
I tried very hard
To fill this room up
With love for myself,
I painting the walls
With kind words,
I tried to turn it into
A sanctuary.

He tore down the walls
Of my boundaries,
My privacy,
My safety,
And my dignity.
He stole it from me.

I spent over a year rebuilding
And taking it back,
I was doing fine.
I want you to understand,
I was doing fine.

I bought new sheets,
And new underwear,
I moved my bed,
I got new clothes,
I got new medication,
And a new job,
And someone who loves me.

I was doing ******* fine.

And now it’s all crashing down again.
It’s fresh
All over again.

It hurts all over again,
And hurt isn’t a strong enough word.

I want you to understand
How horrible this is for me,
But I know you won’t.
And she didn’t.

All of that, all of the reopening, all of the **** pain, and she couldn’t even listen.
Nemo W Aug 2018
My heart
it aches for you
the soft linens of your skin
the way it envelops
my paper thins
My heart
it yearns for you
the white wind of your lips
the way it soothes
my black wisps
My heart
it pines for you
the pride of lions of your eyes
the way it penetrates
my blank stares

My heart
come home to my heart
Nemo W Aug 2018
secretive and sweet
your eyes are pIeRcInG
slow movements
sensual looks
you know my all
and i know yours

unveiled and vulnerable
your smell is iNtOxIcAtInG
slow movements
sensual looks
you know my all

passionate and rough
your body is eNtWiNeD
quick movements
hungry looks
you know my all
and i know yours
Haven't written in a while but it's so addicting now.
Nemo W Aug 2017
hey you
i know you're in pain
why not let it all go?
you can do it
you know you can
it's right there
just grab it
just do it
the knives
they're right there
just do it
just do it
just do it
just do it
struggling with this so bad today :'(
Nemo W Aug 2017
my mind screams
in agony
so much pain
nothing to gain
my pulse quickens
in stride
so much pain
nothing to gain
Nemo W Aug 2017
I see it in your eyes
the fire of your life
and how it excites mine
my heart dances wildly at the flame
as for this longing, the fire is is to blame.
my little fire,
do you want my heart?
or do you wish me to burn under your blaze?
the only thing that will comfort is your gaze
you're all i want and its clear
you're my little fire, dear
For the one I care about.
Nemo W Aug 2017
in this empty bed i lay
lost in my thoughts
all in disarray
as i look up to the ceiling
my mind begins reeling
what is this feeling?
all the mistakes
all the hate
all for me
how can it be?
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