Remind the children
in books
in tales
in life
that monsters
are not always supernatural
do not always live under beds
or creep inside closets
in fact they can be amongst us
walking, breathing, existing humans

Only they are far more real

**Far more terrifying

And all those who gave me goodbyes
my distant father,
a kind friend,
an unforgettable lover,
have looked on to their beginnings
while I held on to all those torn ends

In the quiet cold wind
The blue bird stirs
It flutters its wings
Among pines and burrs

The sting of the night
Is fresh on the air
The absence of light
The death of a prayer

The blue bird flutters
Its eyes the only light
Silently it mutters
Feathers caught in flight

Its blue blur beckons
Briskly bustling away
Eyes set on the heavens
Flying for the break of day

Dear heartache,
I cannot say that I know you well,
I have never been in love
But I have loved,
Have loved deeply and quickly and without question,
Have loved quietly and cowardly,
Have been loved back.

Dear heartache,
I just wanted to know why you're still
Hanging around here,
Why you keep dropping by
When I have guests over,
They never stay once you show up.

Dear heartache,
I've only known you on the surface,
Have never known the right questions to ask
But I have memorized the structure of your being,
Can describe the color of your eyes down to every fleck of red-brown,
Can still feel every callous on your palm when I think about you,
You have become so commonplace.

Dear heartache,
I think I know what you're doing,
Think I have thought my way through your facade,
I think you are in love with love;
Think you have been following her around for so long
That you couldn't bare to let her go now,
Think you always show up too late,
Show up just as she walks out the door.

Dear heartache,
I cannot say that I know you well,
Cannot say that you have made a home for yourself
Somewhere within me,
Can only stand within your reach
And hope that someday while you are chasing love
She will find me.

Sickening and ******
This is the life and love I Chose?
-no , not chose , the one I got.
I was handed this was I not?
This love I have for men...

I was bullied on the playgrounds
Since I can remember.
Back then being gay was something
Entirely different then my mature mind now comprehends.
But even then I noticed it was
Something all mankind resents.

I guess deep down Ill always love
Women. What's not to love.
But turning a blind eye won't help
, love is blind anyway
Or so they say...
I geuss this means I must be gay.

But will I recieve blessing ...
Or scorn from up above??
Dear God , is this morose
Or is this also love??