People often ask me what love is  

And I seriously don't know what it means

All I can think about is you

Your eyes, those brown eyes

Those eyes which saw me naked  

You saw every scar on my body  

Yet the only thing you said was

“You are beautiful”  

Love, I am not beautiful

Scars, stretch marks, blood, wounds

Doesn't mean beautiful

I am not an art

Yet your lips kissed me

The way the sun kissed my skin every morning

Without a fail, without any doubt

You smiled.  

And the only words that came to my mind was

"****, this is trouble"

My love, your words hold me like a hostage

Trapped inside an empty box, finding a way out.  

A way I can never ever get a glimpse of.

I knew that this love

Our love would last a lifetime  

Or so I thought



We were torn apart by hatreds, insecurities, confusions

Maybe if it wasn't for distance  

We would be still together, we could have worked it out

But maybe, no matter what decisions we'll make

We will still come to an end

Confused about the future

Insecure about other people

Hating each other

You, giving up

And me, craving for more

Craving for something that can fill up the hole inside my chest



I wanted you to stay forever, here beside me

But every time I would ask about it

You always said

"You deserve so much more"

You were once my everything

My other half

My partner in crime  

You were someone so freaking important to me

You were the kind of mistake, I wouldn't mind repeating

I fell so hard for you

And guess what happened?

Love, I am broken



How many days, months, years

For me, to forget

That once upon a time

You were here

I was there

Hands holding tighter

Eyes locked to each other

Hearts that beat in a synchronizing manner  



How much would it cost?

For the pain to stop

For the memories to abandon

For the feelings to fade

My love, I did not expect any of this

I didn't know that love can be deadly

A love that can force someone to commit suicide  

That loving someone means tearing every part of yourself





Now, do you think I'm suicidal?

Love, do not be afraid

I'm not going to die

Being suicidal doesn’t mean killing yourself

Suicidal means I wouldn't mind dying

I kept on dying anyway

I kept on dying at the same place I thought was giving life to me  

Because the day, you decided to give up on me

I already gave up on myself.

A ceramic vase shattered in front of her eyes, she was not the one at fault, but she fixes it anyway.

Now at 18, a boy’s heart is shattered and he's now in front of her, she was not the one who broke the boy’s heart, but she fixes him anyway.

Beauty creeps up and in through the window
everyday she comes to visit

myriad changelings, this time of year
and a stillness after a storm

all a oneness come rain or shine
she taps lightly on the senses

I am here, I am here
she whispers me to sleep.

i have never liked jealous lovers
it's such trivial emotion
since being with you I feel it more
envious of the mundane

the sun that sees you first as you wake
the coffee cup that kisses you good morning
your work colleagues that spends hours with you
a smile, a look, a laugh I've missed
the moon that knows your midnight secrets
your sheets that touch every part of you whilst sleeping

i realise jealously makes me fragile
it means i will tolerate no rivals
it means i'm scared
of the very thought of losing you

If I had to describe
Love as a season
I would like to think
For myself that is
That it would be represented
By winter.
Now I'm not just saying it
For the sake of it
I actually have given this
Much, much thought.
Ok so winters opposite
Would be summer
Alot of people would think
That love is summer
And maybe it is.
Hot nights, midnight adventures
Damp hair and Sandy clothes
Summer bodies and bikini's
And every other summer cliché
You could possibly
Think of.
I just sort of identify summer
As one night stands
Or new
Fresh relationships.
Because it's just a time
When you're absolutely
Carefree.
Or atleast I think it is.
Whereas winter
Is weirdly
More personal.
It's when you're wearing alot of layers
And your hair is always a mess.
Pink tinted cheeks
And hot drinks.
I feel like this is a time
Of the year
When I'm more vulnerable.
For some very odd reason.
It's a time when
You really know
Who the important people are.
It's when you know you'll jump in puddles with them
And freeze your *** of to keep them warm
Or when you have conversations
About stuff that really means something.
It's rain.
And the scent straight after it
Petrichor.
I either feel cozy and warm
Or drenched and miserable
But wanting to be with someone
No matter which way you're feeling
I think that's love.

Sparse rendering of things that you want to say. Ideas translated into pen on paper. Emotions can be rendered but not always. Sometimes speaking with no words is desired. To see the face of the person you wish to speak to, and to let them feel your emotions. Sometimes this is all that is necessary, no long prose is required, no great written script. Only the exchange of what is known but not spoken between two hearts and souls. For sometimes, words are not enough to communicate what you really feel.