"No!" she shouted,
Pushing herself as far into her bed as she could.
Pressing her hands over her ears,
blocking out everything
but the music
blasting in from her ear buds.
She dissolved into the sound,
Forcing her mind
To let go
Of feelings such as touch and smell
Until she was weightless,
Floating into a void
Rather than sitting in the smog
Of cigarette smoke and alcohol
That was omnipresent in her house.
Just relax, she thought.
Letting the guitars and voices
Of her saviors wash over her,
She fell into a half sleep,
Where the only thing
Other than the music
Was the longing to live here,
Endlessly,
In a void of nothing.
Because if there's one thing she'd learned,
It was better to feel nothing at all
Than nothing but pain.
I can't believe you're making her feel this way. I wish you would just leave. I'd rather have no father at all than a father like you.