Narcolepsy* hard and heavy watch me fall asleep
            Lulled to bed in a cunning thread of the tangled web we weave
    I dream in pristine colors, windows of my mind anew
No fingerprints or ***** looks or evidence of you

         I find comfort in forever wherever it may be
        I may have left my home but it will always stay with me
                 The smell of all the smoke with the sound of all the rain
   On constant playback every second deep within my brain

        I found that time is all that matters and everything else faded
        I spent years and years learning how to forget everything I hated
    I've only gotten older and have nothing left to show
              Except a ringing alarm clock and blood on my pillow

     Narcolepsy** hard and heavy watch me as I sleep
     Another pill, another high, another date to keep
      If I shall die before I wake, I hope that I'm with you
    Then it won't matter where I go, cause you will see me through

It was a nice summer's evening. Taking a stroll with my dearest friend.
Laughing and remembering the days.
Back when we were the three muskateers.
Before the world unleashed our greatest fears.
He held his breath allowing the memories to invade.
I swallowed the lump in my throat as the tears threatened.
"Where did we go wrong with her", He whispered.  "Where!", His voice broke.
I Held his hand and laid us down.
The grass overwhelming us as it wrapped itself around us. I turned to look at him, his lifeless hazel eyes showed nothing but a dark pit of pain. "Where did we go wrong Rea? Her lifeless body is burned in my memory, the sounds have stained my ears, Why am I still here, why are we still here?", He cried.
I fondled with my hair and cried, "I don't know what we did wrong. I don't even know why we're still here", my voice broke.

I want to use all the alterations, Personifications in the world to impress you.
I want to drive you insane with the oxymorons, the metaphors and the similes.
I want to use coliqual words so that I can make you think I'm extremely smart.
When really in reality I'm just average.
I want to use euphemism and lititoes to really make you think I'm that good with words.
When really in reality I have writers block yet I want to capture your attention.
I want to write an iambic tetrameter with the rhyme scheme ABAB so that you notice some part of me in my writing.
I want my words to ****** with your mind so that some part of you thinks about me...
But I have writers block, There's not much I can do to grab your attention.

Wake up! It's another day
A step closer for serenity...I crave
still swimming in the sea and frail
gasping for air, fighting the waves
I find myself trapped in a sombre place
Desperately seeking the light to escape

The truth is I never loved you the way you loved me...
It just happened that I cared more. But its okay go ahead and break my heart.
I honestly wouldn't have had it either way.

This is for the people who know how it feels to be at lost and thrown off balance.

For the people who know how it feels to plaster on a convincingly intoxicated facade so that they can drag their vacant yet burdensome bodies around without a doubt in mind.

The people who know that their world is beginning to slowly crumble around them while they try to hold onto the remaining pieces.

People who know and cease to believe that they have the ability and courage to let go of the dense obscurity in their chests to let in the weight lifting fluorescent.

Who know that they should give up but refuse to give in.

Those are the people who know.

And are not alone.

I don't know what to think anymore

My brain says one thing and my heart says another

If they only could only join as one, wouldn't that be better?

I want to go but I also want to stay

I want to say no but that wouldn't be OK

I don't want to hurt but I also want to be felt

It feels like I am being pulled by a big tight belt

I think it's my conscience talking or could it only be me?

I don't want to sound selfish but I am very confused

Don't know what to do

My brain all bruised

I can't feel nor can I think

It's like I am on the brink

I hope I don't fall

Because of it all

If I only knew what to do

I wouldn't be here

Thinking and feeling of this dreadful
fear.