I'm tripping the breaker.
Soaking in the burn of the wires,
Tracing the line back to an old fuse box
With a broken switch
And a battered shell.
Grey with ambiguity and boredom
Seeping productivity like an oil spill,
Diluting the green.

Twenty one centuries.
And some pocket change
Just so we can all act
Like the pressure was worth the diamond.

3:06 pm

this state of dejection is familiar,
yet stronger than before
i feel i've lost all sense of what is good,
and i wonder what goodness i have left in my life

-z

she told me not to cry during the night
so i'll wait 'til tomorrow
when the sun will shine
and i resist loneliness
since the sun, i know, will shine
to warm my soul
with euphoria
and so i do
think to myself
nostalgic
of this life
where love does flourish
in a place
and there i do exist
and i am happy
and i am so in love with him
the hymns are haunting
though i do play them
over and over
i listen
like a broken record
for a broken heart

such wonder
s and such moment
s that still fill my heart
so heavy with emotion
so natural like the sunlight
that does shine for me-i think
until-i question
yet again..
what happens if it does not
rise again
what happens when it rains
and so i start to cry
and my whole world does fall
like rain
i look around
as time stands still
amidst a puzzle of a place
i stand alone
under the same sun
as the ones who came before me
and cursed me with this soul
i run
to the waves
take me to loveland
i scream
into the wind
no one else can seem to hear me
has no one ever?
while a voice is sometimes louder
in the mind
rather than within the world
where volumes drown the lyrics
to the most beautiful songs
of myself

looking directly into the sun
i see nothing
feel
nothing
and i cry no more

i dont want the things i dont know about you
to become permanently unknowable.
which is to say
please stay.
spill your heart
on my ripped jeans like morning coffee,
clumsily, everywhere,
& when it is most uncomfortable.
you dont have to hold me constantly,
just when i need it,
enough to know im wanted.
this burning building body i call home
does not need gasoline,
nor to be extinguished.
please just learn to appreciate the imbalance.
a careless constant carnival act.
what i could say,
what i should say,
english becomes foreign
when trying to speak to you.
i apologize ahead of time.

If I can swim in two feet of water
then I can swim in ninety
This depth won’t drown me
My legs are strong
but my mind is stronger

A dictionary in a bag of bricks.
I watch it sink down the swamp.
Words only mean what we do with them after,
So I never feast until I know there's dessert coming.

I am the stone before the statue.
A block of possibility.
Waiting for guidance like a wiseman,
From anyone that can convince me we're not all mad for trying.

I am the stone before the statue.
Waiting to be carved.
Waiting to be told who I am.

at some point in time
you have to stop

stop being sad
heartbroken
and as blue as the tears you cry

because the icecaps are melting
and the seawaters are rising
and every tear you shed
is drowning us

none of us can stay afloat
in weeping waters

s.s