There
will
be a day
where you don't
run-across
my mind
whenever
I wake up.
           But for now,
I'll let you
rest as I
enjoy my
morning
cup
of
tea.

of my heartache.

There's no need
for any explanations.

And although you
may not understand;
      I cannot
          deny
    the way it feels to be
               in your
       presence.

Why did you have to pull me in like this?
Why couldn't you be like every other girl?
Benign? Impermanent?

You were untraditional, unorthodox,
You became air where there was none,
Water where there was only dust

And then you told me that you were sick,
And nothing brings two people in like illness,
All of a sudden everything changed

I've never felt like much of a father figure,
But ******* you made me care like one,
Probably why it's still so agonizing

And I'm still tasked with laughable ideas
Like "letting go" and "moving on"
And I know that there's no alternative

There is no room for me in your life,
You've set sail for new waters,
And I'm simply left to drown

We stayed up late
and talked for hours
We spoke words we had never uttered before
let thoughts escape our lips before we could think twice

We talked about those who had hurt us
and those we were afraid might
and how we had hurt ourselves

When we spoke of escaping i said
"I always liked the idea of jumping"
But he had a better plan
"I would take a knife a cut open my heart"
When I asked why he said
"I like the symbolism"

when i look into
your eyes, the whole
world just stops moving,
time stops and so does
my breathing, my heart
beats faster than ever
and there is nothing
around us,
only you and I.

your brown pupils
piercing right through
my soul, my green ones
only doing a minor
scratch that will be
soon forgotten and
washed away.

but even with that,
i keep on looking,
hoping that i will
see a spark in your eyes,
that no one has seen before.

Some places in me
Are hollow
And if you press too hard
I'll cave in

I don't need empty reassurances
Of my wholeness
Just acceptance
Of my vacancy

But please know
That barrenness
Does not mean less
When it comes to loving you