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JJ Nov 2019
You told me that this world wasn’t big enough for two.
But I’ve walked around this world babe,
and it seems that it’s bigger than we once knew.

You texted just to tell me that you’d moved on,
that you’d found somebody else.
You told me that you were finally happy,
but I’ve seen inside your heart,
and happiness is something that it could never comprehend.

You phoned me up just to tell me that you’d done something I wouldn’t want to know about.
You really seem to think that you’re better off now.

So if your heart starts screaming out my name,
if your head starts talking backwards,
just know that I don’t feel the same.

And if you feel your heart start turning into stone,
well I hope that you feel comfortable
with being all alone.
this is mean hahaha
JJ Jul 2019
Old paper factory town.
The air smells of boiling cabbage,
and even when the sun shines
the cold air could chill your bones.

There’s not much more to do than sit around, counting our fingers.
Nobody can make it very far -
they’re either too old or too high.

Three headless horsemen stand guard before the ungrateful.

Maybe I don’t need to find my place.

Maybe anywhere could be my place,
as long as I am in your arms.
JJ Jun 2019
He paced between two feet.
His eyes wide, unblinking.
He rubbed her legs and told her to stay safe.
He searched his pockets,
I don’t want to know what for.

I had been a cloud.
I had floated through the night sky.
He told me he’d come back.
I believed him.

I thought things were different,
and oftentimes they are.
But what is left there waiting for me,
when time can’t heal all wounds?

I long to feel safe in the streets.
So this is old, but I thought since it's Pride today it would be a nice time to post.
JJ Mar 2017
I waited, I waited, I waited,
and I waited a little bit longer.
Someday, somehow,
somebody had to save me.
They had to, they did,
because I never thought that I could save myself.
And you know what?
I didn't have to.

We wait for the one because anything else would be simply embarassing.
But I didn't get one, oh no.
I got three.
The moon.
The stars.
The sun.

Eventually everything stopped making sense.

There was a wolf knocking on my door, and I was begging him to break it down.
Wolves howl at the moon, that's just their nature.
But he never did.
He spent hours and hours just sitting, just staring.
What big eyes you have, Mr. Wolf.
Big, brown eyes.

The moon saved me from my past.

The stars shone like jewels that night,
the night that I encountered the troll.
Trolls live under bridges, that's just what they're used to.
He asked me his riddle,
I gave him my answers.
All of the wicked games and aggressive glares followed us.
They followed us all the way back under the bridge.

The stars saved me from my future.

For the first time, I saw the sun.
An existence of wanting and waiting was made that little bit easier by it's bright, nourishing light.
The sun made me forget why I had once cowered in fear,
once shaken with anger.

The sun saved me from my life.

I don't remember when things stopped making sense.
Maybe it was the night I tore my chest apart and screamed below the moon.
Maybe it was the night I spoke to the stars and they spoke back.
Maybe it was the morning that the sun made me forget.
JJ Aug 2016
I haven't slept for a while,
I've had a fever and it's kept me awake.
My plan was to sleep tonight and pretend that I was perfectly fine tomorrow.
I really thought I meant that in regards to my health.
Now I suppose I won't be sleeping tonight either.
JJ Nov 2015
Her laugh was golden, yet hollow.
The colour dulling over time, without the sun to help it shine.
Her eyes were silver, when they gleamed. Oh God, how pretty her eyes could have been.

Her heart was black; the most beautiful, nourishing shade of black I had ever had the blessing of seeing.
Her heart was painted black, layer upon layer of cruel intentions that only I could see through.
It wasn't her fault, don't blame her for it. Don't hate her for it.
Don't ever tell me that I couldn't love her for it.

Her wings were built on rainbows and stretched further than I ever would have thought they could.
She could only have hoped to fly one day, because rainbow wings couldn't carry the weight of the world;
but she let go of that weight, and can you honestly tell me that you wouldn't have done the same?

The days are pink now.
The layers of black that once enveloped her poor, weathered heart are fading.
Fading so quickly, and still you try and tell me that it wasn't worth it.

I'm glad she learned to fly, and I've never been more proud of a person.
I know it's not fair of me to say this,
not about the strongest person I have ever met,
and don't get me wrong, I really am glad that she learned to fly,
but sometimes I wish that I could have learned to fly too.
i really really miss you
**** anybody who tells me otherwise
JJ Sep 2015
Every grey cloud is painted over a pink sky.
The sky is pink. It is, it is, I know it is.
I can see it. I really can.
The grey clouds used to envelope me, until we were one in the same.
But the pink sky was always there.
The pink sky is there, and I'm telling you: I can see it.
But it's still so ******* grey.
im more happy than ever
im more depressed than ever
i dont understand but maybe this can help
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