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Payton Apr 2018
I hear the words "I've changed" a lot
but have you really given it a thought
Why do you say that, when it's not true
The only one who believes it, is you
Why keep coming up with these lies
when we all know you just come down from highs
You say you want to get away
but you do the same thing everyday
You have a boyfriend who beats on you
but you choose to stay with that low-life shrew
Why are you putting yourself through this
Why can't everything go back to what I miss
Do you even think about how I feel
All I want is for you to heal
I miss the person you used to be
A mother who was always full of glee
The mother who used to stay with me when I was sad
Now all you do is do everything that's bad
I cry tears in front of you, begging you to try
But yet, you'd rather go and get high
Why do I keep praying you will be the mother I once knew
even after everything you have put us through
Another poem I had written about my mother a while back.
Payton Apr 2018
I wonder what you see in your eyes
as everything inside you slowly dies
You push away the ones who care
and they won't always be there
You don't see how broken you truly are
The mother I once thought who was bright as a star
Every inch of you has changed in so many ways
You're no longer the mother who used to pray
Ever since I left you that day
your world began to turn grey
You stopped trying to find your way
so you began to fade day by day
You slowly began to fall apart
so much that you can't restart
You show me that you don't care
and that is what hurts me, I swear
You no longer have that warm smile
that used to stretch on for a mile
The mother I once thought who was kind
turned into someone who is completely blind
You hurt others around you, including me
but yet you refuse to let yourself see
I will never understand the things you do
I only know that you have broken my heart in two
Another poem I had written about my mother a while back
Payton Apr 2018
I sit in my room crying at night
because you no longer care what's right
Me having faith in you, made me a fool
You putting me through that was cruel
I used to think that things would be fine
but this time you crossed the line
I no longer have faith in you
You went back to him but what's new
After everything he has put you through
you still go back to something that isn't good for you
I hope you're happy with the choice you picked
You made me see that you'll always be an addict
You have no idea how you make me feel
Half the time I don't even know how to deal
I don't know how to deal with this aching pain
I just wish it would all go down the drain
This is a poem about my mother who chose drugs and a boyfriend that has beat on her over me more than once.
Payton Apr 2018
Us
We choose
what we want to see
We believe
what we want to believe
We love
who we want to love
We do
whatever we want
We listen
to whoever we want
We don't
do what others want us to do
We do
what we want to do
We
are who we are
And
we have to live with that
Payton Apr 2018
I can't seem to get you out of my head.
Every thought, every memory, I dread.
Why did it end up this way?
Everything that has happened is not okay.
Why can't everything go back to the way they used to be?
I miss everything we had, don't you see?
I miss talking to you day and night.
Now, I'm wondering if we're going to be alright.
How come we drifted so far apart?
Can't you see what it's doing to my heart?
I'm the only one who cries myself to sleep.
Everything about us, I wish I could keep.
But everything between us just isn't the same,
and you're the only one to blame.

— The End —