are you awake
can I take a peek inside your head

wonder what you were thinking
how many days did you look at me
not knowing my name
how many days was I nameless in your eyes

maybe I hate that you're not mine

let's watch a movie
let's drink together
let's spin in circles until the moon falls

asking you the question of the day
why can't we be friends ?

screaming louder
why is she better ?

here, we do not talk about the mistakes.
we do not bring them to the light,
we let them sit inside our dark places,
let them fester and rot; eventually,
we let them **** us.
it’s only a matter of time, you see.
but we never speak of them.

a tangled mess is
what most would call it,
wrapped in a series
of unblossoming madness.

i was blinded by the fact
that i'm letting these roots grow
that i've forgotten to **** out
the thorns of all my sorrow.

When I tell you
That I'm in love with you
I will do so with a poem
Because that is the language
That I speak.

there is blood in my mouth
i know it is my blood
could be from
tooth cheek nail
throat raw from crying

my hands are shaking
a catalogue of sensations
that are making
my knees weak

and i know you’re
talking to me
can see your mouth moving
think i hear my name
but can’t be sure

there is blood rushing
in my ears
through the frantic beating
of my heart

and i just want it
to slow down
keep from stumbling
over itself when
i think of you

and you’re still talking
i think it’s to ask
if i’m okay
and i want to ask back

what do you want
me to say?
what do you want
to hear from me?

because it hurts
it hurts
it hurts
it hurts

six more,
i hate myself,
you, so adored,
so walk out that door.