Raining too fast
Drops suspended in air
A soundtrack to back
That sad indie playlist
I bet you wouldn't like

There's no reason for things to be like this
There's no reason that my heart shakes
There's no reason that I feel this way

But there's also no way
For me to push this down
For me to block this out
As much as I hate it
I miss it

And seeing them their
Upstairs
In long pants
And tube socks
And smocks
And just tubes in general
And the new boy
So nice and shy
I can't help but wish
It wasn't always over

There's no reason for things to be like this

Cars rumble
I can smell you on the tarmac
Catch me on the breeze
That drifts through the
Open car window
It's too stuffy in here
I'm too busy today
To take my time and
Watch the clouds
Race across the sky
Just as busy as I
We scuttle along
Like ***** in water
And sometimes I wonder
About you
Up in your art room
About graffiti and drugs
On the streets
And their ***** hair
And unreadable eyes
About the cryptids
And cigarettes
Cults in the woods
The filthy scrub
Down by the tracks
That you left in my heart
When I left your constellation
Was I really a part
Of your personal set of stars

Some nights are fine.
But some nights,
Your face is all I can see
When I close my eyes.

You said that day
Haunts you,
But do you lose sleep
Like I do?

How many consecutive days
Have you stayed inside
Because you were too terrified
To go anywhere on your own?

When you walk to class,
Do you keep your head down
And your eyes on your feet
In fear that I might show up?

Do you need four million volts
In your bag at all times
Just to feel something close
To safe?

Do you cringe
When you think of me?
Do you still feel me
In your grips?

Did you find someone
To care about you?
Someone you care about too?
Can you ******* tears
When they kiss you?
Does it leave a guilty taste
On your lips
The way you left bruises on my hips?

When you hold them close
Are you reminded of the way
You held me throat?

Does your skin crawl
When they touch you,
Because no matter how close
You're dying to be
How loved you want to feel
You can't get rid of the memory of me?

No. Of course not.
You're not haunted.
You don't know what it's like
To have the ghost of someone
Who stole your sense of self
Live inside your mouth.
You don't know
What you did,
And I don't think you ever will.
But I hope one day
Someone makes you feel as small
As you made me feel.

there are no ghosts
in the sky,

my tabby cat wears the moon,
curled into the corner
like a sleepy fog,

the dreamscape is made
of silver and gold,

you (like always)try to get my
attention and i (like always) ignore
you, trying to write
my poem…

like bubble gum,
the sugar was gone
far too soon
and when the flavor left
you did too.
spit me out
tired and bored
you pursue other candy.