I’m putting myself in situations that are about you but the situations doesn’t exist

Apart of me still wants you to love me back

I didn’t believe in love anymore because of you
I lost all faith in finding someone who would love me
I lost love in myself ....
I don’t think you know how much of an impact you had on me

I’m sorry to my younger self
For not taking care of you
For not standing up for you when getting teased
For not being strong when you needed me the most

I’m sorry for giving you bad thoughts
Bad memories
Bad feelings
Sorry for when I said I hated you and wish you didn’t exist
Sorry for making you feel like a failure
I’m sorry for everything I put you through over the years

I promise you everything will be ok
And that I will always be by your side no matter what
It’s ok to cry
And it’s ok to get angry
I don’t ever want you to feel the need to be strong even when you don’t want to again
It’s the hardest feeling to go through
Trust me we did it for four years

It’s ok the be yourself
It’s definitely ok to say no to people
Your one year from turning 20 and it think it’s time for you to be free

I wish I could travel back in time and ask you a couple questions
I have some things I want to tell you also but that’s for another dark night

I want to make you happy
I want to make you proud
But you have to know that it will take time
I am not perfect
I will **** up like I always do
But I promise I won’t give up on us
I love you
And I mean it this time