Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
Marina Neal Nov 2017
she’d stab
and twist the knife
she’d “clean your teeth”
but make your gums bleed
she’s crickets chirping and ellipses
and that’s how you know
when someone has no love

and it’s always the ones
who once said they don’t want to hurt you
who hurt you the most.

~MN
Marina Neal Nov 2017
when i cry
i’m always afraid
that i won’t be able to stop
and i often wonder now
if there’s enough
sadness in me
for me to cry myself into dehydration
if i didn’t hold anything back

between letting my sorrows drown me
and purging all that i am
i cannot decide

but perhaps the decision
is not mine to make
     i must also remember

this life i am given
is not mine to take
...

~MN
Marina Neal Nov 2017
it was a heart
for a second
the blood from the line
i made part of me
i went to take a picture
this is art
i thought
but by the time i got the camera ready
it was just a collection of red

~MN
Marina Neal Nov 2017
i didn’t think of it as a relapse
because i never meant to stop
i just went without for awhile
till i again craved a drop
or more
     typical
     i thought
     for me to act this way
     one bit of distress
     and it’s on display
     even though i don’t mind
     if you see it
     that is not to say
     that  i’m proud of these things
     i’m just dealing with pain

yet again.

~MN
Marina Neal Nov 2017
Wet
With these tears
also wash my dreams away
I don’t want to think or feel

i’m clothed but i’m bare
i don’t wear my heart on my sleeve
my heart is sewn into my eyes
so i can try to lie
but i can never hide

everything comes out of me
these thoughts and feelings
for anyone to see
in blood
in tears
in sweat from fear
even the air i breathe
tastes like broken dreams
and tells you everything
i could never want
you to know about me

~MN
Marina Neal Nov 2017
sew my lips into a smile
and take away these lids
now that i’m an adult
i need to stay awake
whatever i don’t need or want
just give it to the kids

there seems to be a problem here
i’m still not feeling right
this smile hurts
my eyes are dry
and i don’t much like to cry
by trying to survive, now i cannot get a wink at night.

~MN

— The End —