i used to be
afraid of death
isn't that funny
because now
i like killing myself
i like the feeling of
being torn apart by
other people's opinions
i beg them to tell the truth
even when i know
it's not what i want to hear
tell me
tell me you liked my hair longer
before i cut it short
tell me
tell me i'm too skinny
that i should put on some weight
tell me
tell me you're shocked
tell me i should know these basic things
i want the truth
not a sugar coating
and i don't exactly want it to hurt
but i'm starting to think
it is better than nothing

do you dissociate too?

do you find yourself floating in space?
not on a gentle cloud or on the wings of a soaring eagle,
but on my own, supported by just air as i lose my head.

do you find yourself underwater?
not drowning but not breathing either.
the water rushes in my ears and the voices beside me are muffled
so i am left on my own with only my thoughts to accompany me.

do you find yourself gliding above ground?
i work through motions and play like a puppet on strings.
my feet never touch the ground while my head lolls on my shoulders.

my ears are plugged, my hands are clasped to still them.
the noise of the whole world is attacking me but i cannot decipher a word.
do you dissociate too?
please don't tell me i'm the only one.

Ask for a planet I'll give you a galaxy.
Ask for a word I'll write you a poem.
I will do anything to see you happy.

The knowledge of growing and feeling the flowing
of the ins to the outside showing, what you are.
It's enough to drive you mad hoping to make glad the hopes of your mom and dad while being your own man with a plan who along with everyone is pretending he can.
True change is subtle and I'll pose a rebuttal to any of those quick fix ****** that think life is anything but a struggle.
I constantly tell myself to take the toys of life off the shelf and be not a man but a very mature boy who enjoys life for what it is.
Insignificant in the grand scheme but significant and supreme to each individual, it can be full if you feed on the right stuff and not this materialistic fluff but relationships and love.
The taste can't be replaced it's easy to get tossed and lost in the cost of brand names and hearsay claims; you hear the heresy names shouted at you for being different.
Take time to rewind and look back at the facts that make you true. Apply the sutures to the wounds so the futures got more room to grow and you know you will.
The past never returns and the future never arrives so your only choice is to be present and alive.
**** fear, you don't need it. Make a goal and succeed it.
Everyone is different and this life is on rent so make sure all your money is spent by the end my friend because only dead plants don't grow.

again and again
   we watch
yesterday's paper
   wheeled out
folded, bound
   for the dumps
its pulp reborn
   for today's paper
and the headlines
   reprint itself
over and over

Kindness
It is not hard to get lost in your own self-deprecation,
But this is easily remedied by re-evaluating the situation.
See your woes from the prospective of those causing you anguish,
And ask yourself, what has happened to them to make them so selfish?

Abolish Blame & adopt generosity of heart,
You’ll start to see a small act of Kindness is a good way to start,
Then adapt this gesture to reach out to others,
To strangers, friends, your sisters & your brothers.

By choosing to act in kindness and not with a selfish attitude,
You’ll feel your spirit lift & with it flies your selfish outlook and your low mood,
Your eyes will start to shine from helping another soul,
Because you simply stop thinking about you, and focus on all other individuals.

So, Be Kind, be brave, be honest & true,
and if you know your morals are good, you will certainly bring out the best of you.
Learn to love life and care for all living things you find,
Because the secret to happiness is simple, you only have to be kind.

Witness the unknown
Reach the unforeseen
Travel,to live
Penniless and Excited.

Burn the midnight oil
Drifting through subconscious visions
Toil, for such majestic realms
Penniless and Excited.

When hunger strikes
Kingdoms, rather Dynasties, fall
For the ever growing appetite
A man hunts
Penniless and Excited.

That sweet spot, a special place
Where love is felt
To live, love
Penniless and Excited.

Travel.
Dream.
Hunt.
Love.
Penniless and Excited!