Months later,
and still I sit in the shower
for hours at a time,
hoping to one day
wash away the handprints
that didn't belong
on my body
in the first place.

-k.w//cleanse

happy yesterday
indifferent today
sad tomorrow
depressed always

Tomorrow
I'll
Wake
Up
And
Find
You
Dead.

Is there anyway,
Is there anyway
That I'll see you when I get back home?

Is there anyway,
Is there anyway
To go back before we drifted away,
Before we left on our own?

Because on Sundays
When the sun's rays hit my face,
I see you
And I see who we used to be.
And I see that we should've never had to have to had to have to had to have to leave.

And I'm stuck thinking,
Was it really fare!
Was it really worth living in the end.
I'm stuck wondering,
Was it really fare!
Am I better of giving up before someone leave's again,
I swear...
It hasn't been as hard as watching my sister go through so much pain,
Way too much too bare...
I wish I gave up before I watched my eyes go through the same,
Leaving my heart bare!
Was it really fare!
Was it really worth all the trouble and all the care!
Was it really fare!
How can we live in a world that keeps us snared...


Tomorrow
I'll
Wake
Up
And
Watch
The
Sun
Rise
Again.
I
Don't
Know
Why
But
I'll
Remember
This
Is
Not
The
End.

Out beyond those clouds,
I hear you,
I hear you calling out.
Somewhere past those doubts
I feel you,
I feel your love falling down.
Even when the tempest stirs,
And even when the thunders call me home!
I won't give up!
You never left me alone!

I don't want to be his five minute cigarette break
I want to be the person he comes to every time he lights up a blunt
I don't want to be drunk with him on a Saturday night
I want to be the person who's there with him when the sunrise is up on Sunday morning and he's still hang over
I want to be the person he drunk calls at four o'clock in the morning when his mind is blurred, yet my name is the first and only thing he thinks about
I want to be the person he thinks of when he is so high and he can't think straight but the thought of my face is always clear no matter where his mind wanders off
But these are just my thoughts when I've already had five hits
As I watched him across the room
He probably had too many to drink and lit up a lot
When he takes his last hit, he smiles at me
And the thoughts I had felt like forever
But only a minute passed by
But when he grinned at me
In that moment I wished it lasted for a long time
He probably won't remember any of this the next day
I know I will