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 Dec 3
Kalliope
I trace your name on my collar bone,
It feels good on my skin.
Craving you this badly,
Will be my lifelong sin.
It feels so good
To hurt this bad
 Dec 3
Kalliope
I see brown eyes when I close mine
And messy dark hair,
Your hand in mine while the sun rises,
Tired from 3 am deep dives into eachothers minds,
Kept awake only by the desire of your presence,
And the electricity from your touch,
A touch not felt but so soft just the same,
But my eyes will open,
As the sun creeps over the trees,
Right when you're about to kiss me
And my brain will curse my heart for allowing such tantalizing visions
To creep in again
I'm more of a sunset girl
But you make me want to watch
The sun rise
 Dec 3
Kalliope
I've begged for you for so long
There's a hole in my carpet
And bruises on my knees
But it doesn't feel wrong
If I bled out for you
You'd only see a mess
 Dec 3
Kalliope
Somewhere between yes and no
Where the sky is purple
And the water so still
The grass grows tall
And it sways in the wind
I could stay here forever
My dress flowing in the breeze
Your gaze holding mine
But I can't build a life on maybe
And neither can you
But who's going to
Look away first
Maybe we grow old together
And preach forgiveness to our grandchildren
But maybe I never see you again
And you're just a story I tell my daughters
 Dec 3
Kalliope
I don't give up
It's not in my nature
Even when it burns to hold

I don't give up
I ponder and wonder
If you're supposed to feel like home

I don't give up
I tend my wounds carefully
And return to fire once more

I don't give up
I wait around and prepare
For them to come back through the door

I don't give up
But maybe I should
It seems like they always do

I don't give up
Delusions fill my head
And my heart really still loves you
So I'll tend to this fire
And burn with desire
With hopes you'll come around
And try my best to love you without sound
 Dec 3
Kalliope
Carefully removing posters from the wall
But the tape always catches
And rips at the edges,
Never careful enough
And like the tape
I never escape
Without a piece of them
Always with me
 Dec 3
Kalliope
It was all real
For a moment
And I was sad
When I woke
But happy to have
Spent an hour with you
Even in the shortest naps
I live lifetimes with you
 Dec 3
Kalliope
Your sun has set,
And my butterflies flew away
But even under your moon,
I'm drawn to you like a moth to a flame
Your flame so bright,
With a purplish hue,
I'll try every night,
To get closer to you
 Dec 3
Kalliope
I'm not good with money, a budget never could manage me, I hate when it's sunny, I prefer rain and a breeze.

I can be silent for days on end, can't even bring myself to sing, easily broken yet hard to bend, my mind is a stubborn thing.

Sometimes I get lost way too deep in my thoughts, have fun trying to guide me away, and I'm sensitive too don't yell in my room, it'll just activate the rage.

And God I get mean, inconsiderate and spiteful, with nowhere to lean, I'll feel my anger is rightful.

My hair clogs the drain, it's long and disarray, you won't get my brain, I cry like every other day.

I can't do my makeup, my eyelids don't shine gold, I'll threaten a break up, the second I feel you're cold.

I'll have the last word, everytime we disagree, I don't know if you've heard, but you shouldn't love me.
And Sweet boy I love you
But I'm a real mess
If I focus on the bad
It causes less distress
I can't focus on our good
When I'm trying to lay us to rest
 Dec 3
Kalliope
These feelings flow out of the corners of my eyes like river rapids and pool all around me. Every time I think I can come up for air I start to drown again. And I'm searching for anything to keep me afloat but all I see is you, and the waves come crashing again.
A place once so safe,
A person made a home,
Now cold as a wraith,
Leaving me alone.
 Dec 3
Kalliope
I hang onto your every last word like it's the last bus home at midnight but the driver is inconsistent and now I'm stranded.
Do I wait under the flickering lights
Or
Do I start my walk home alone
 Dec 3
Kalliope
And I'll look at the sky and search through the stars for validation of this feeling, and when I find the moon I'll think of you and suddenly my heart is reeling,
Do you look to cosmos and wonder where my mind goes when suddenly I am silent?
I'm just lost in your brown eyes hoping you realize that maybe you want this too.
But maybe you won't and I study stars all alone, finding signs that were never really there.
But I've read them constellation for constellation,
Searching for the love we share.
Some nights I find it and others I don't, but I blame that on the clouds, if we can't see it I promise you'll hear it,
My love for you is quite loud.
If you look at the moon
When I look at the moon
Can you feel me?
 Dec 3
Kalliope
It's the first snow during the last year you believe in Christmas magic,
It's the desire to watch the tornado form even though the storm is heavy,
It's 9 am on the first fall morning of your freshman year of high-school,
It's your favorite sweater fresh out of the dryer,
It's the warmth from your mug of coffee radiating to your palms at 5 am,
It's the last laugh at your first slumber party before you fall asleep,
It's the sun creeping over the trees,
It's the sound of your Playstation starting up after a 3 month hiatus,
It's Thursday,
It's orange sun rays warming my skin,
It's a thick navy blue university that you never went to sweater,
It's fuzzy slippers,
It's Holiday themed squishmallows,
It's potato soup that your mom makes on Sunday,
It's cookie dough ice cream at midnight,
It's a warm cinnamon roll in the morning,
It's the number 22,
It's the way that when I close my eyes all I think of is you.
My feelings for you I can't describe,
But reading these instances you'll get the vibe,
It's just too simple to say I feel safe,
But in your arms I've found my place.
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