Couldn't wait for you to get it right
With each passing day
Disappointment came at night
Chances you ate like candy
But you get no more
And I can take no more
Like a hurt puppy I will lick my sores
Your number in my phone no longer exists
And as we split
Deleted images won't be missed
Or the times our lips touched when we kissed
I can't get far enough away from you
I want you out of my life
Sight
And mind
And once the memories of us burn
Then I'll be fine

I was told that heartbreak is beautiful,
that I can use it to create something,
use my skills to create words of beauty
from the beauty of my pain. Yet I can't.
Pain before was my muse, but then you
replaced it and now you're gone. I have
no words because my words left me, you
took them. I wrote my love into an
ancient ballad of confessions, only for
you, and it turned out to be a goodbye.

I sit alone at night
with tears held in my eyes.
I sit alone at night
and hope that I may die.

I know, that it's no good
I'll get nowhere at all.
But without my Shady Grove
I'm broken and I'm small.

Shady Grove's, my little love
Shady Grove I say.
Shady Grove's, my little love
I'm bound to go away.

I wish I had a golden pen
that could write all my lines.
I wish I had a golden pen
then Shady Grove'd be mine.

Cherry's in the summer time
apples in the fall.
If I can't have the girl I love
I won't have none at all.

Shady Grove's my little love
Shady Grove my friend.
Shady Grove's my little love
I'm leaving in the end.

I know,
I know there lies no answer
in the bottom of this glass.
On occasion though,
it certainly kills the question.
And yes I know,
this glass holds no peace,
but it certainly makes telling yourself,
you've found as much
a little easier.
And yes,
yes I know.
The glass holds little more than a slight reprieve
from self loathing,
from guilt,
from the colossal weight upon my shoulders.
But it seems you,
and hope,
are always gone.
And the glass is always here.

I miss you,
when the wind flows like music
through the trees.
And I hear it as I once did your laughter.
I miss you,
when the sun sets
and I see it as I once did your smile
beneath your now sorrowed eyes.
I miss you,
when the stars hang high
and I find myself cold and alone in the dark,
for lack of your warmth.
But I miss you most at night,
when I wake up in an empty bed
searching for what's not there.

Hello, I miss you
Sometimes I tell strangers about you,
Sometimes you're still all I think about
And sometimes I wonder if all I have left is a really good story

The things you left in the past could have changed your life
The things that wouldn't last, still alive, just barely
A tempestuous undeath unto your frail memory
Just trying to make it through another day

It ended in a flash
As the blast
Shattered my ear drums
Like they were glass
I embraced death
With a hug
As it tugged through my flesh
And turned my heart into mesh
My legs limp  
And as I fell
To the pale earth
One more look into her eyes
And to my surprise
It was I
Standing over her as she died

I wrote my words into happiness from
my agony, in hopes of regaining
something. My agony turned to happiness,
and I was able to write the future.

I wrote my words into agonies from my
happiness, in hopes of it never happening
again. My happiness turned to agony
as I was able to write the future.

I wrote my words into alternate realities
where I had lost you, hoping to avoid
that pain. My fear turned into reality
for I was able to write the future.

So now, I am writing my words into a world
where I didn't lose you, venting my agony from
the happiness I turned into pain, in the hopes
that I can still write the future.

I've forgotten what you sound like
If you were near
What you smelled like
Would be unfamiliar
I can hardly remember what you look like
No calls
Or text
But the silence I like the best
Happy Father's Day
To a father who was never here

He's lost
Stumbling
Pine cones crushing beneath his feet
Getting whipped by the trees
Covered in cuts
From the spiky leaves he brushed
In a rush
Running from trust
He's being chased
Hunted
His life is on the line
Gasping out of breath
He can't be caught
He rather be lost

Teeth chipped
From when I was clipped
Love is hell
And as I fell all
All I could do was yell
And on my way down
There was no soft ground
Only the concrete
Which eventually I would meet

decisive words
   take their time

they reveal their significance
   like buds unfolding
   nourished by the soil of doubt
   the rain of memory and meditation
gradually to the troubled soul

until the flower
   of loss

   suddenly
   in full bloom

makes you tremble
at its pristine
    relentless
    beauty

      * *