I am Lost

My soul resonates
with the prettiest and darkest things.
I feel and hurt
and live and rejoice
and die and hate
and forgive.
I do it all
in a whirlwind of emotions so no wonder.
No wonder
I don’t know what’s forward or backwards or even what to say
Or do next.
I am so lost.

You threw me to the snakes
leaving me to fend for myself,
discarding me like an object that
you had grown bored of.
And,
when i crawled out from the pit
more powerful than before,
venom coursing through my veins ,
I became the monster.
I became the one to be feared.

How easy it is to forget that monsters are not born
but made
and my dear,
you are responsible for every inch of the creature I have become.

Dawn is blazing
the world is still
this is
the time before times.
Watch the sun kiss
the moon goodbye.

Broken-record words,
twirl in the lobes of a brain.
Don’t play again.

One morning at sunrise,
I walked the beach
Looking for shells.

High on the bank,
Where no wave could reach,
An old man watched intently.

After a while
He gestured with his hand,
Calling me to him.

"You have many lives to live,"
He said (in a strange accent)
As he picked up a handful of sand
And let it run back to the ground
Through his fingers.

"That's a lot of lives", I said,
Watching the last of it fall
And trying not to look afraid.

"Not the sand in my hand," he said,
"The sand on the beach."
He extended his arms,
Raised his eyes,
Then vanished
Before I could speak.

small actions can have world wide consequences
just ask the poor gentle Butterfly as it flutters on by.

oh how intimate
his fingers comb my hair, to
trace lines on my nape
and see things I'll never SEE
like the inside of my ear

lets offend the clouds so you can rain on me
lets obey the sun so you can burn me with your hotness
my heart was molded from your smile
brightening every breathe with chuckles

cant wait for morrow when i have you today
for with you is spring and you away is winter
your vibes are streams of flowing waters a sip for lifetime glory

reminisce with me
out of my addiction for you
you are the drug that drained me and one that healed me