Where did you go?
I see the sun set.
I can actually see it go down.
The world gets darker.

So many bottles of champagne surround me.
I celebrate nothing.
I lose entire days.
But men that look apocalyptic fill me up
Until I put my ***** clothes back on
And trample back to my den.
Worn, apologetic, and wishing it would all pass.

Glittered nails and crooked teeth.
I think back on my past relationship and laugh.
Who was I?
Who was he?
I can't even remember anymore.
And that's a good thing.

I just want on vacation.
A long week in Florida.
Sun.
Oranges.
Kitsch.

I've said it about every ex
I'll say it again.

We're going to be okay.
It may take time.
But one day we will talk.
We will laugh.
And we will smile.
I wish you all the best.
And I know
Deep down
You do too.

i only know you from photographs now
i torture myself by still following your life
after tonight
i will not
there are so many new songs
so many new jokes
so many new places i've danced around
without you.
i am starting to love me more.
and i was told that you're jealous.
be jealous.
you pushed me away.
and i'm pushing up.
and that includes my *******.
you have no right to be mad.
so I hope you're happy.
**** my beautiful, magical *****.
you poor thing.

the faint metallic taste in the back of my throat woke me up
i'm frightened of my own blood
my face matches her's
my eyes match his
mom
dad
i'm so afraid

Always lazering in on body language
two and a half full years of casually impersonal hand touches
give, take
give, take
immaturity rises when i lose sight of the present and you ask stupid questions
let's just forget the past, present, and future
but please don't do

out of nowhere i see an icon i only thought existed in my prolonged dreams

go-go boots, striding down streets that are immortalized in 1980's plays

almost every song that comes on my hand-held robot croons like something from "**** Bill" - operatic, righteous, and honest

sights of beginnings and new beginnings on a small screen

the air between my mattress and the wall rumbles as we grow together again

I.
leather skin
tattoos from youth that are laughable
as messy as a room gets every month
succumbing and cleaning up a mid-life crisis
a broken wind-up soldier
folsom prison's bar ‘s open every time the sheets get too cold
two year expiration date
grease
red wine at a dive bar

II.
never completely remember anything except touch
whiskey clouded brains and side-ways smiles
tongue-slinger
serpent waiting to strike
retracting and falling backwards far
slithering in during the AM
charming underneath the stairs
monotony
unwanted terms of endearment
the tea kettle will always whistle when the water gets too hot

III.
spells and red lights flicker at late hours on unseasonably warm nights
sweat and dragons both thrive from heat
smoke, from mouths and cigarettes
shakespearean scenes that melt to fingers grazing lips so effortlessly
this was all coming in due time after too many moments
spent on washing machines in an ancient haunt
falling into fictional identities when we come together
doe eyes
tears fell from poetic words spit so harshly on delicate air
a temporary home and an eternal momentary escape