carminayasmin

carminayasmin Oct 2018

literacy

if you cannot tell yet;
I have poured you out scripts, testimonials, fantasies
- libaries
I question myself at every letter.

For what reason I write,
For one who can’t read.
Who was I to have you inked into my skin,
who was I to ever think it was all right for me - when I was blind.

Who was I to write
when I can no longer spell.

7 October, 3:01am
regretting it all in the am.again i always do

#metaphor #heartbreak #love #hurt #pain #alone #write

carminayasmin Sep 2018

sinners

we pursue to confess sins that
have not been sinned.
rather than repent to ourselves
to bathe and soak in guilt that lurks amongst blood.
It’s okay if it keeps you awake
but sins is nothing but a disguise we put on ourselves
when we feel
that we have wronged the world.
We never do.

April extract

#sin #regret #guilt #metaphor #love

carminayasmin Sep 2018

crisp

my heart is empty because you burnt it dry
leaving my love limited,
because half of it burns away slowly under your sleeve.

April sometime

#love #romance #heartbreak #ache #fire #loss #pain #metaphor

carminayasmin Sep 2018

.

One day I’ll reach the end,
my mind’s weapons put to ease.

#metaphor #end

carminayasmin Sep 2018

Goosebumps. {a result of cold, fear,etc}

The way in which goosebumps electrocute and run down my skin when I awake, to shield from the cold mornings -
Is the same way I cast myself closed when your presence threatens me, so I don’t melt into my weakness.

Mum turns the heating on but I still shudder.
You slip away but I still suffer.

9 September 1am something

#love #romance #heartbreak #fear #pain #metaphor #cold #morning

carminayasmin Sep 2018

halfandhalf

he splits the world into two
half into illusions, spells of daydreams. coated in love stories and poetry. sprinkled in lustful gazing.

other half, the dawning reality of the nothingness that has so many pages. I flip through needlessly to try understand it all . I never do. I try to pull my head out of clouds, I never can.

its not real it won’t ever be

1:43 after seeing reality

#love #metaphor #heartbreak #pain

carminayasmin Sep 2018

god forgive

These nights I pretend to myself
and whisper to myself that

its not only you but,
alas,
you are confused why it still pervades you.

But I am told that
God calls lying evil sin.
And through Eden,
God tried to say to the world -
that lust is demolishing.

( but who is god to say)
it’s all so beguiling
and delirious.
and god yes it’s demolishing,
when reality resurrects every day and I am
thrown to watch it before me
even if I close my eyes
or bite my tongue till blood.

only the false sins I whisper
will wipe the blood clean.

I don’t think god runs this place
who is he to judge

#love #romance #heartbreak #god #metaphor #pain #sorry