Bleed my name
Every single blood cell should crave my loving
Need me
[I need you to need me ]

Everything is asleep
and in pain, in love
and dreaming
about another life
I say to myself,
it is time I take my own
lookout, unfaithful
sailors know they can't
see a thing but they keep
their place on the prow
out there in the darkness
where boats are colliding,
oh yes, they are blind
or awake feeling the dark
like light, like those levels
of cold and heat underwater,
you know what I mean,
when you are dreaming
or in danger, that place
where fish live and sleep,
sometimes I think I understand
everything,  but I know that
I am wrong, and incredible
as it seems, the shadow I see
when I'm hung, I want to think
of hideouts in the mountains
where a man can go to die there.

.

My label was showing,
flipping out from behind the collar
of my non-U.S.A. made shirt
Sri Lanka I think,
but I can’t see the back of my neck from here

Perhaps that is why they stare or
maybe it is why they don’t?
Well, that's okay, I’m new here,
first time on this floor
(I pushed the wrong elevator button)

Fancy suits and low cut gowns,
hors d'oeuvres, champagne, noses held high,
some are long ones to look down or up at
“Bat in the cave! Oh, did I say that out loud?
Sorry lady, no I wouldn’t like any avocado"

Whispers, murmurs or just low talking,
there must be a hundred of them
I thread myself through the crowd
making my way to the podium where I speak,
“Hello I am a poet and I’d like to read you something”

A strong gust of wind races against my face,
not air from any open window,
but the breeze created by their mass exodus
as they head for the outdoor terrace
for a smoke or to spit on those below them

Then I saw her, standing in the middle of the room
all alone, staring up at me
Deep brown eyes, dark glistening hair
and a smile that out-beamed the overhead recessed light
“I’d like to hear your poem,” she said in a euphoric voice

I gazed upon her mesmerized, feeling my throat tighten,
sweat appeared on my forehead as I lifted
a slip of paper from my back pocket
I looked it over and looked over at her…again
Then, taking a deep breath muttered,

“I must apologize, for it has become obvious to me
there is no more beautiful poem than the one
standing before me at this very time
To read these words which I have penned
would only pale to this I find”

“Thank you, that is very sweet of you,
would you like to go for a walk in the park?
I’d much rather be outside than inside
and maybe you can read me some
of your wonderful poetry there?”

“I’d love to, but what about them?”
I asked motioning toward the crowd on the terrace
She picked up the tray of sliced avocado, some champagne
and slipped them out the door, then giggled,
“Those insiders will be just fine outside for a while”

As we headed down on the elevator
she leaned up and kissed me
and it was at that very moment, as my heart
was nearly beating out on my chest I knew,
(I had pushed the correct elevator button)

So, you rather they lie to you than to be honest to you.
You rather they be less direct instead of being real.
For the ones that bold and upfront is the ones many ladies linked to disrespect.

When they come real, you states they rude.
When he upfront request to take you home.
He's fine with you saying you won't.
And get offended when he approaches another one.

You, like many ladies point out the type they want.
And more likely here you will find the best Oscars qualified actors.
They will fit the role perfectly that you seek.
And accomplish getting all of your treats and sweets.

And then, when you wake up from this fantasy and he's not what you thought?
Now he changed when in truth he did all the things you stated you seek.

But now you wants the guy that honestly spokes the truth.
Except he now doesn't want any part of you.
Roles, we play in our pursuit.

I'm so far inside myself
Starting to feel like someone else
Getting lost in the dreams
Of the girl in mirror
That I can no longer see
She's beginning to scare me
And it seems like my mind
Is her favorite flavor of coffee
She drinks up my thoughts
And gets a rush of energy
All I can feel for her is envy
Yet, she's supposed to be inspiring
And me? I'm practically dying
Just waiting for the mood to strike
Finding the right music to surround me
It's tiring and
I've been living life so patiently
Feeling like
It's starting to get to me
Breaking the mirror inside my eyes
Does nothing
Neither does smoking out my mind
She just seems to soak it all in
Breathing in the fumes of my coffee
Giving me nothing but an empty space
And my face
Is just her face, minus the evil grin
I can't even begin
My muse is addicted
Trying to get her on the mend
Find the fix she needs
So this beginning
Doesn't start with the end