When my demons were small
I didn't care
I let them grow

Then they started to spread
and now they are
in every corner of my head

****** your monsters
before they take you away

**** those monsters
before its to late

I still
kiss your picture
goodnight
every time  
before sleep

These days,
talking to you is like
screaming.
Under water

No matter how loud
I am,
the waters will always drown out
my pleas.
To the ears that need to hear them.

I think I'm cracking under the pressure

it's the same as before
or the other time
or the time before that.
here's a ****
and here's a ****
and here's trouble.

only each time
you think
well now I've learned:
I'll let her do that
and I'll do this,
I no longer want it all,
just some comfort
and some ***
and only a minor
love.

now I'm waiting again
and the years run thin.
I have my radio
and the kitchen walls
are yellow.
I keep dumping bottles
and listening
for footsteps.

I hope that death contains
less than this.

and you said,
I don't care about you.
I have no problem,
I just don't care about your existence anymore.
nothing personal,

and now I understand,
no one will stick around for you.
even those who love you.
and you just have to let them fly away,
like butterflies you wanted to take.