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We are in trouble
Overwhelmed by reality
We choose to sleep
Being awake is painful true
But what else would you choose?
Disconnected with the truth
Disillusioned with "inclusion"
But when we as women chose to stand
With other women
Away from our brethren
We undermined our people
Their problems weren't ours
Respect in our households and communities was never the problem
But now we're truly  included
In the reign of terror
By the hegemony
that we were never actually excluded from
So now while we've branched off
Into this group and that
Engulfed in the rainbows, weaves,  
****** objectification, drugs and popular culture
We are sleep crawling
To our extinction
It is better to live through pain
I n order to achieve gain
Than to nap through life
Never understanding your greatness
It is time to rise and return home
It's impossible to me
How you can't see
Or maybe just wont admit to me
That your attentions
Are divided disproportionately
It is what it is and
I am in no way green to what I signed up for
I am a grown woman
But I beseech you please
Don't lie about it
A pill is still hard to swallow
Even when called another name
Yet the unease and doubt
Just before it hits your stomach and after it leaves your veins
Cannot be chased
When words don't mirror actions
How do you plead your case?
That your actions are reaction to my action?
I guess we shouldn't admit your action creates my disposition
How about we just avoid the whole situation
And throw out the prescription
I need you to be sick
without me
Because this is what the thought
of without you
does to me.

I need you to mentally replay
our encounters conversations and videos
Because this is what I do
when I can't talk to you.

I need you to taste me before seeing me
because I always feel and taste you.

I need you to hear my voice
when I'm not around.
Because I'm tired
of feeling crazy
about you.

I need you to understand
that the little things you do
are always noticed
and they all have little shrines
in my mind.

I need you to know
that I'm an attention *****
and although I like to share
sometimes I want to be stingy
with your time.

I need you to know
that when you're upset with me.
I feel needles in my chest and I can't breathe
it’s an incredibly slow burn.

I need to know
Do you truly love me to
the depths that I love you?
Can your truly promise your desire and passion won’t fade?
Will you always be my best friend?
Will I be yours till the end?

Because if you can’t answer yes
to all of my requests.
Then my love is in vain,
And you should leave me alone
And hope for the impossibility
That my love will wane.
I just wanna be there
while you're in your deepest despair
to make you smile brightens my week
when it comes to you I get so weak
making you laugh sends me on a euphoric bend
a feeling I never want to end
if only I could transfer my joy
the ultimate goal of my ploy
but diffusion isn't the only way to transfer energy
so I opt to smother your face in kisses
with the full intention of making you smile
but as soon as my lips leave your skin
your smile fades and I'm at the drawing board again
we both know its nothing physical I could do
regardless, I'll do what I have to
don't you know for you,
I'd cut myself open if that's what it took
for you to feel comfortable enough
to open up to me like a book
so i can be your shawman and heal
the layers of wounds and scar tissue
they left all over you
something you never have to worry about from me
I'd hurt myself to help you
but please don't thank me
because I'm selfish you see
I just want you to brighten my week
So delicate and ripe
Fruit waiting to be picked
I can smell the sweetness
Before I even dive in
So excited the anticipation
Has me famished
And us both leaking
So earnest in my approach
My descent seems snails pace
Spreading her open wide
Caressing those thick buttery thighs
My moans haven't developed yet
So all I can do is sigh
As I plant delicate kisses along each thigh
Tongue tracing the curves of her love
Nuzzling my nose in her fresh mound
Inhaling the intoxicating essence
This meal may stick to my ribs
Running my tongue along get dripping cavern
Such a sweet drink
Sweeter than my dream
My thirst has been ignited
As I envelope her between my lips
I feel her pearl throb and twitch
My tongue can't resist
And as much as i try to pace myself
I become ravenous for her nectar
desperate for her taste
vice grip on her hips
Caught in a frenzy
Oblivious to her moans, cries sighs and thrashing
Her libido is no match for my palate
Learning the mystery
May be a feat
Reminiscent of pulling teeth
It can be time consuming
But never in vain
Because if you can ever be trusted
To understand without judgement
The reward can be so sweet
usually more than the average can handle
From passion, compassion and loyalty
We are indeed valuable companions
Definitely worth the effort and patience
Because we don't offer information
And even when you ask
Initially trying to get to know us
Our answer will accomplish
Only half the task
Because growing up we learned what not to say
Definitely the hard way
Exposing our interior and
Shedding our hard exoskeleton
Is a thought beyond terrifying
And a task that is quite daunting
Revealing a membrane underneath
As intrinsic and complex
As it is delicate and fragile
Attempts to damage or injure
Can prove beyond fatal
For the venom used against you
Is comprised of fermented resentment
From the cumulative pain you've inflicted
used with lethal precision on
Your insecurities, pain, and pride
drawn from Information that you provide
The easiest way to avoid heinous defeat
Is via honesty, loyalty and
Through the words and promises you keep
Most chose not to heed a warning so distinct
And are horrified
When the revenge exacted is so succinct
The manifest has been written
And she will be sought
But when I meet her face to face
How will she react?
With a simple embrace?
She's so beautiful
Smooth skin and a sweet grimace
She's always fresh and sharply dressed
It's been so long that I've dreamed her
Yet her image is so vivid in my mind
So many times I thought I could just reach out and grab her
Only to awaken to a disappearing mirage
But alas dreams become reality
And I feel like a groupie around her celebrity
Unsure if she's aware of my quiet insecurity
Even though I've dreamed
Do I deserve to be here?
But she merely smiles
As she beckons me closer
With each step I pinch myself
To make sure I truly exist
Just as soon as I reach her
I close my eyes and enjoy the ride
Her embrace is like a sweet kiss to my pride
Humbling me effectively
Causing my soul to smile and shine
Radiating like new armor
I open my eyes to drink in my newfound skin
And like magic she is gone once again
And then I realize
She is finally part of me
And no longer is reality only in my dreams
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