i try,i pour,
even though all the words dryer than my tongue,
even when my soul is at the edge of crying,
i try,i pour,
every single of words at the end of my lips,
every single tears from my eyes,
every single soul i wish to cry,
every single message i wish to try,
but,
i am the one,
who loves to try,
even when the message is beyond reach.

I can’t listen.
My mind is a prison.
Tears fall down my cheek.

My confidence weak.
No appetite to eat.
Thoughts race and prevent me from sleep.

Bags under my eyes.
Whats that in the sky?
They tell me its just a phase.

ADD isn’t real.
Why is this such a big deal?
Little do they know it ruins my days.

Can’t focus in class.
Teachers think its a load of crap.
No one understands that this isn’t okay.

I try so hard.
I studied all night!
But I always seem to fail.

Look at my medication.
Look up the facts.
When will they realize ADHD is real.

Reality and daydreams.
Which one is real?
Which is more important;
The lesson in class, or the color of my nails?

My confidence; frail
My complexion; pale
My mind?
A jail.

But I put on a smile.
Make life seem worthwhile.
Because once in a while I can finish a task.

But pretending i’m fine.
Missing homework deadlines.
It’s like i’m hiding myself with a mask.

Don’t get me wrong.
Some people have it worse.
At least I have a roof over my head.

Although i’ve cried.
I’ve never considered suicide.
But others wish to be dead.

So treat me with respect.
Break the stigma.
And educate yourself.

ADHD is real.
It’s an unfair deal.
So you can choose to understand mental health.

I don’t have enough focus to listen.
And thats what your missing.
This is not a choice, this is something I dread.

So next time you judge me.
Next time you label me.
Remember, some with ADHD wish to be dead.

in the silence,
i can hear something is shattering,
but it’s not the glass,
from the table,
nor from the kitchen,
what is it?
its turning into dust and debris,
all over the place,
but blinded by eyes,
and silence at mouths.

He’s calling me,
anywhere at any time,
in the broad daylight,
or in the darkest night,
where i should see the stars,
shining darker than what i've seen,
flowing with elegance,
making sound like no other,
he’s laughing at me,
saying “you’ve lost”.

painted it black,
with elegance,
resembles as my pain flowing,
through out the whole canvas,
overflowing but still beautiful,
painted it black,
with modesty,
resembles as the trauma speaks,
louder than my mouth,
out of place but still intact.