Don’t confuse the two
Happiness and Love.
They usually go together
Hand-in-hand,
But they are not the same.

I can Love and still be miserable
I can be Happy and not Love
Ultimately,
Find someone who gives you both.
And you’re set
Now They can’t use you.

It goes back histories ago, you’ve heard the stories.
Humans, born as a giant beast, uneventfully split as punishment.
That split soul became the humans we are now, two halves separate.
The story goes, life after life, their kind would search endlessly for the other half.
Destined to never unite, destined to feel incomplete for all eternity.

Our soul doomed to search endlessly until the end of time, but I know fate is in our favor, benign

If I can’t be with the rest of my sole, then I’d rather be left a hole

Their love is more than adequate, it’s a feeling that never quits

I thought I found you some time ago, but it was a selfish soul with an ego

I guess I’ll continue my search, I don’t think I can survive much longer without your perch

Thought I found you again later in my journey, but I was just a slave to a sick wretched tourney

I use to look up to the stars at night, ponder, are you too thinking of holding me tight?

No matter how much time it’s been, I will feel the same for you as I did then

It’s the way our spirit makes me feel, full enough I don’t ever need another meal

Our spiritual bond will not be forgot, we are intertwined together as a knot

I will never again let this curse leave me detain, I fight with love, not distain

Until finally, through my search I found you, without using any of my senses, I knew. you did too

I know you’ll never leave us again, our journey together has just began

I know our pain may hurt, but we’ll always rise stronger no matter how hard we hit the dirt

I’m more than jovial our souls were united, life was so hard while we were divided

I felt what you felt when we were apart, we knew something was wrong from the start

Those happy days I felt so much pain, I could feel you fighting just to keep sane

The things we’d do to one another, it would leave blood covered on each other

I searched for you my whole life, if I’m lucky enough one day I’ll call you my wife

No matter the weather, nor life as rough as leather, or as dark as the nether, as long as we are together our soul will not tether

Memories I forgot long ago
Mother and I frolicking through a meadow

Hands held tight together, chained
Her soul in mine, preordained

Beautiful Rose columns entwined as a whole
Barren was my sole when I jumped
through that beautiful knoll

“Why would something so beautiful be so rough”?
“When you’re that beautiful you must be tough”. She said in rebuff

“Then how will I display my love to such Rose who keeps me at bay”?
“Those who truly love such Rose knows  how to portray, to keep away such unworthy prey”. She said in dismay

Young at age, yet such refined words gave my soul much to crave
Yonder I put that Rose, although there I’ll be each stage

Physically be with that Rose always you not
Paint that Rose with praise for all of days, not what you bought, or what you fought, no other gift will lift as such, naught

No other love will ever approach, nay can ever replace such love for a Rose or that of a mother
Naked is that Rose with no thorn, forlorn just as all of those, native is that Rose with no lover

Such a Rose must be protected from the worries of life that make life hectic
So let that Rose be, respect how it’s protected, your neglect may make its thorns as sharp as a knife, always stay connected

Vibrant as nature, diverse as life, different as you
Variety is a color many souls abuse, but can’t relate, taken for granted, but on the right canvas, creates the perfect madness. I’m familiar with the color, are you?

Life, as fickle as that Rose, more beautiful than those, but do not take lightly
Love, sweet as that Rose, everyone knows, or when you hold too tightly?

Keen was my mother as she patched me, pain in her eyes from what she’d seen. The growth of a son, oh so much to be done

Agony in her eyes, as strong as gasoline, sometimes life can be an arson
Alive as a being, potent as kerosene, pain is more than an action, it’s a person

Kiss she gave, as we laid. I slept in her lap, my soul wept. Not from the pain, from two souls, mother and son. I watched the Rose, I told her, “I felt your pain, I would do it again, please tell me, does that make us one...”?

I got lost, confused, forgotten my Left from my right
I’ve seen her before, or It, in my Dreams, a Light
So warm, reassuring, this Light held me more than tight
Ultimately, I awoke, darkness, I lost that sight

They say, true Love waits
At times it’s difficult, a world fueled by Hate
But I know, deep down, it’s never too late
I’ll find it, that light, my soulmate

Let me tell you, I found, that light is a true beauty
Made for each other, I know, truly
I’ll do my best, I will, Her happiness is my duty
She’s just what I want, I crave, my she’s such a cutie

Even in true Love nothing goes as planned
We must fight for our Love for there are many demands
At times it may be shaky, unstable, knowing not where we’ll land
But we’ll get through it together, we’ll learn Love together, firsthand

No need to rush, we have our whole lives together
Together we’ll experience it, no matter the weather
We’ll fly together, our Love as light as a feather
Our connection deeper than blood, our Love will never tether

Worry not my Love, no need to feel insecure
I’ll mend your heart through sheer Will
Stay by my side, you’ll see there is nothing to fear
I’ll adore you for always and always, Dear.

I’ll fight for you, even if you don’t want me
I’ll guide you, even when you can’t see
I’ll care for you, even when you don’t agree
I’ll wait for you, even if you leave
I’ll pick you up, even when you’re clumsy
I’ll be your foundation, your stone, your tree
Can you see now? You and I are meant to be...

He approached the cellar,
An endless abyss of stairs.  
He could feel something... a stare
But can’t see it from all the clutter

He grasps through the dark
At any chance he’ll reach a light,
Like a month in the darkest of night
So he decides to light a spark

A stench more foul than death
A wretch about to meet the wretched
The outline stole his breath
A trail of slime so wicked

It’s skin shifted
It’s head lifted
Teeth glistened

With eyes dilated
And mouth salivated
It’s distorted body elevated

A slimy, contorted, mangled, freak
Enough to make your confidence weak
And your future bleak.
Enough talk, it’s time to eat!

I wasn’t suppose to fall for your love
Your entrance was a fluke
Our meeting a mishap

These feelings for you are a misfire

A chemical created, molded after your Scent
A message received that shouldn’t have been sent
A firing conceived, with no way to vent

My heart wasn’t for hire
Dire is my life the more I love
Of all my chemicals that fire
I wire yours to my temporal lobe
Above all else, you will always be my misfire, second to none

I was raised to avoid drugs
But I cannot get enough of you
Your scent so potent
Wrapping around my entire being
An addiction so freeing
Destroy my mind, my prudence
Your slave, please, erase what I knew
Along with what I’ve dug

Promises are an illusion, just don’t fall for it
But your intoxication is the only truth
A vaccination for the moot
The solution to my pain
Because we are the same
Inject you straight to my root
Your love won’t leave me alone, sleuth
Please give me my fix, even if it just a bit

Please, let me forget
Every day living in regret
My soul is on His last reset
It’s clear you have our future set
Right from the moment we met
Unfortunately, you decided to leave
Collapsing my Everything onto me
But that’s okay, you weren’t there to see
Death only asked for a small fee
Heart torn apart seam by seam
It’s not your fault, my Dear
Never mind that is was my biggest fear
You’re near, nevertheless, not here
I wonder if you even shed a tear.
Utterly hopeless, desperately hopeful,
Consequently, not me in the mirror.

His Heart put on a wire
Life gives him no choice;
Left to chance.

A heart so dire
Unable to maintain His poise,
He drowns in his romance.

Will you Sink or Float?

Would you ***** the fire?
Silence the noise
Live life entranced.

This time you’re the liar
Silence the voice
Love at first glance.

Do you see the goal?
It somehow physically manifested itself
What will you do?
You can walk to it, give up, or run
Run until your lungs concave
Till your blood is boiling red
Till your muscles burn through your skin

Run until you are whole
Take it from someone like myself
The things I’ve been through
From someone who’s never won
It’s never to late to save
All those times I should be dead
But the race is about to begin

Don’t put that dream on hold
It won’t always be there
Time to see what you’re made of
It’s not a measure of skill
Or if it’s even your forte
It’s a matter of potential
It’s a sum of endurance and will

Your mind will try to fold
Your lungs will run out of air
Or the hate that came thereof
Your warm blood may spill
Even your own thoughts will betray
Your bones will feel fragile
All that matters is you don’t sit still

The objective isn’t even to finish
It’s not over if you can’t reach the end
You just need to try your best
You won’t forgive yourself otherwise
Life isn’t only about reaching the finish line
Life is about small wins
Proving you ‘can’ along the way

Chase those dreams you cherish
Don’t run alone, run with a friend
Every life is blessed
Now run before your Fire dies
Failure is a part of life, it’s not a crime
The strength to run is within
Don’t listen to me, hear what your heart has to say...

Remember when they showed remorse.
An ounce of humanity peaked through,
Like a light from around a dark bend.
Unexpected, but craved.

Or how they supported you
When you needed it most,
Without any reimbursement
Or a second thought

Especially when they fulfilled every promise,
As your heart turned six sizes
Their ego shrank times ten
And your life felt complete beyond fathom.  

Do you remember?
Can you remember?
Do you want to remember?

Even though your whole life is a farce.
A screen being your only view.
A text is the only thing you comprehend.
Expected, yet I still cannot fathom.

For every sleepless night you loose,
Feeling like a living ghost.
Just know, everything comes to an end.
No matter how you were taught

Remember all the sacrifices everyone performed.
And all the closure you received from everything that died.
All the relationships you didn’t have to pretend.
The gratifying look on their face as you proudly call them, Father and Mother.

It’s alright, Me Neither...

You left without any closure
So the wound stood open
Festering in it’s own filth

The pain severed the synapse
The rot ransack the body
And the trauma snapped the Stem

Fortunately, it won’t affect you
Just me, and everyone like me
For those whose hearts are too big

Well I say, we were ready to fly anyways
Ready to leave the nest
But not ready for the suffering you spread

No, you left us for dead
Like the rest,
Living waste

We kept away from the swig
Learned from what we could see
It’s Us you never knew

You’re just a flightless hen,
Truly a nobody,
And we’ll enjoy watching the collapse

We grew our own tilth
With our own Son
I just hate having to call you father

I see it releasing.
Black smoke
I know it’s burning,
Yet so peaceful, so enlightening.
The demons risen with the smoke
Vanished, to never come back

Gone
As dark as the day started.
Did it truly ever exist?
Something so painful
Looks so beautiful
Why?

Just for a moment
It reminded me
The feeling of Death.
Fragility at its finest
And reminded me,
Oh how beautiful

They’ll never see your potential
Then again, that’s not the purpose.
You Live for yourself, everything you
stand for
Nothing more, consume the hate
Learn to forgive, no matter how
atrocious.
Hate is a rotten tooth, your tooth
Don’t Live with it, learn to let go.
Only then will you evolve really.

Hate won’t be defeated by a credential
Although, not necessarily useless.
Just wishing for a better view.
Ignore.
Anything so ugly, unsympathetic.
To reveal your true beauty somehow.
Scrumptious.
Solve your problems at the root
Start with yourself in order to grow
Your better than what you can be.

Rid yourself of the existential
Your existence is beyond flawless
Show You the Love you never knew,
Abhor.
Spread your empathy, my Symphony
The time to finally let go is now.
Addictive.
So please, Love, it’s your turn to shoot
Your stance, strength’s from below
Please, for me, learn to be Free.

I inhale the Pain
Knowing what’s to come
The past, the present, one.
It’s going to hurt, I know
But I have to grow
Otherwise I’ll go insane.

This strain of Pain is inhumane
The smoke drops my body numb
The smoke, the body, one.
You can’t see a Heart glow
When sunken so low,
Flushed down the drain.

The Pain keeps you to entertain
A reminder of how you lost the One
The Pain, the Mind, one.
And would you ever Love again as so?
Or would it be safer not to know?
The reality, preordained to remain in my brain till every last ounce of my membrane for all of days, restrained.

For as smart as I am,
You are the stupid in me.
We aren’t meant to be,
You see,
You’re too big for you’re own good
So they take advantage and leave
As Always,
I flood my emotions, the Sea
Erasing every part of me.
A sandy, sham of what I am

You’re not at fault here
I hold you in high exalt, dear
Im afraid it’s into the vault from here
I cannot keep you near, my puppeteer
Although, I see a future that is clear.
A life is only as happy as you hear
Silence the noise, your potential is inhere, and that’s you, Dear.

So flail your tantrum towards thee,
More tragic than Shakespeare.
The future holds many uncertainties
Building a life without Happiness is like building a life in the Sand.
So have more faith, Darling

As Always, your True Love, Sincerely.

You use to shine beyond imagination
Your ambience was a source of life
One who was filled with Life’s Love
Optimistically Obsessive of Our Love
Unable to let Life disturb your peace
Unanimously Underwhelmed

Like Love you Lost to Lust Liquidation
Lackluster in life, a constant strife
I see our Rose bush, a reminder of Love
It withers, slowly, regardless of Love
Every petal has shriveled, lost pieces
Evading Earths inevitable Erasing
Dead, I saw your decay portrayed
Don’t you care a Life was lost?

It comes in many flavors.
Some sweet as honey
Many taste bitter
Or even sour
Therefore none are the same.

Variety creates beauty
Although, that beauty is unusual
Unusual is different
Difference creates the non-normal
Ultimately, non-normal is unique

I’ve once tasted a flavor
It cost quite a bit of money
The taste, heavy like an anchor
A taste I had to scour
Not as sweet as it claimed

I moved onto another candy
The flavor was dull
Almost absent
I craved a sweetness that was ample
Not one that is bleak

I even tested a flavor that was popular
A bit too strong for my palate
Something a bit too artificial
I guess not the right candy for me
Something more genuine is worth a try

All these different essences,
Yet none can satisfy
All these flavors,
Yet they all taste the same
It must be my taste that is awry

I put my anger towards the Shop Owner
He assured me, the right flavor is fate
Something sweeter than an angel
A flavor deeper than the sea
Even one lick for it is enough to die

There it was, in my presence
Left on the floor to lie
Left crushed from anger
Leaving such candy would be a shame
Wrapper damaged, yet still tied

No patience applied from previous owner
I unwrapped the candy left in freight
It didn’t require any muscle
Just something more friendly
A taste, enough to make me cry

The sweetest soul I could ever imagine
Blended with the perfect amount of bitterness
With the right touch of ****,
Created a sensation beyond rare
A flavor that’s solitary

A crushed sweet that carried burden,
Yet still convey such happiness
A flavor that pierces the heart
To which no other candy can compare
Just the right flavor for my palate to carry

It’s cradles me
Like a new born
From what I can see
There is no;
High or Low
Left and Right
Right from Wrong.
Just a single existence

I wish I could feel,
What I felt before
Sometimes, even pain can be comforting

I lost my sense of direction.
My poles had shifted,
Looking for any type of beacon.
I am no longer grounded
I pray I find my way back.
It was always there for me
It kept me on the right track
All those times I couldn’t see
When I was lost, I was found.  
It’s not the same without it
Now I can’t find my Campground
Only thing left to do is sit...

I don’t know what to do
It’s been broken for some time
I haven’t got a clue.
There’s no more Rocks left to climb
I see the darkness fall,
It leaves me ice-cold
In this giant forest I feel small.
I’m exposed, anything can unfold
No Fire to keep me warm
These nights feel endless
No protection against a Storm
My Tent is broken, seamless.

Like a captain with no crewmen.
I travel through these woods aimless
This pressure is a heavy burden
I run and run till I’m breathless
Lungs and body are beaten.
All I see is darkness
In this darkness I feel hidden
A sensation of nothing, numbness
All my hope is barren
All I am is faithless
There’s only one name on my mind...
I reach into my pocket, hold it tightly, I need you, my Compass

I hate you so much.
I hate how beautiful you are.
I hate how funny you are.
I hate how the sun hits your eyes.
I hate your style.
I hate your smile,
Your dimple
Especially your laugh.
I hate how loving you are.  
I hate how you gave me everything.  
But I especially hate how you took it away.
I hate that you cared so much,
But never really did.
I hate that you showed me True Love,
Because I Hate you.
And I hate how much I miss you.
I hate that you were the rest of me.  
I hate thinking about you everyday.  
I hate that I can’t live without you,
Especially in my head.
So, beloved, as always, I hate you,
And I just hate loving you.

I lost my sense of direction
I can’t feel the same sensation
It’s not me in my reflection
I need your guidance
I can’t stand your absence
Surround me in your ambiance

I can’t distinguish left from right
I can’t make it to our Campsite
I don’t wanna be alone in the Night
I can hear it coming closer, Life
Lost in the middle of wildlife
All I have left is my pocketknife

I can feel my sanity slipping
My last fire dimming
My food shortening
I’m so cold
It’s you I want to hold
I’ve reached my threshold

Only thing left is to adapt
My humanity snapped
Endless darkness, trapped
Accustomed to the Dark
Into the night I embark
Creating my own hierarch

No matter what I become I’ll wait for you
To show me the way like you always do
To teach me the things I never knew
No matter how many nights pass
I’ll do everything I can to last,
I need you, always, Compass.