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 Jun 2018 Tafuta Atarashī
T R H
Sometimes when I'm feeling a little too good
I'll think of you
to remind myself I deserve nothing more
than to be broken and alone

And don't you worry
You've planted enough seeds of doubt
to where I'll always be missing you,
and hating myself.
You make me shiver
You make me smile
Just Like First Love

You make me high
You make me thrive
Just Like First Love

"You give everything and you give too much"
Just Like First Love

And we'll never forget how it feels
Just Like First Love

'Cause baby you make me
You make me want to do it best
You make me want to be your last
Just Like First Love
 Jun 2018 Tafuta Atarashī
GONNER
i watch you watch her
i hear you compliment her
i walk beside you as you hold hands with her
i see the way you smile when you talk to her
i see that little sparkle that’s in your eye get a little brighter when she enters the room
i wish you saw me the way you used to
i wish i was still the one who makes you smile like that.
i wish i was the one who made that subtle but oh so distinctive sparkle in your eye get brighter
after all, i am the only one who notices it.
after all i am the one who was always and is still here for you through anything.
after all i am the one who will stick around
after all i am the one who will never be able to look at you in any other way than perfect
after all i am the one who will always look for you in a crowded room.
after all i am the one who is sure about how i feel and what i want and well,
what i want
is you
about a someone
If I could love
the limping
ugly
afraid
part of me
That I drag through the mud
and thorns

If I could let
the transparent
clawing
screaming
silhouette speak
Instead of kicking it
into the basement

If I could put
my deepest human essence
onto paper
for everyone to see

Then.
Then, I could be free.
I was fire, you were ice
You said you'd never crack

I'd like to think you did
Under the flames o' mine

We thought we'd reached equilibrium
Until things got uncomfortable

Fiery as I, bitter as you
We summon blows

I am fire, you are ice
People say opposites attract

We thought the same
Yet we never saw each other again
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