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977 · Feb 2021
Goodbye, my love
Roxana Feb 2021
I stared at your eyes as you poured into mine, together we were alone and alive, so full of love and all that is good but, yes there’s a but in every love story.

You stared at my eyes as I poured into yours, giving myself to you with no choice because I wanted to become one with you but, yes there’s a but in every love story.

Let’s recapitulate, recalculate, put it on pause and really meditate upon the events that transpired, because at first we were so wired, secretly in love at the wrong **** time, fire was burning and we were just learning, really understanding what was happening, but the thing is the moment wasn’t right, we tried to make it fit but it really didn’t sit well with the universe’s plan... whatever that is.

This is for you, to understand my truth. To understand and comprehend that I owe you my truth. I can’t stop thinking about you, and that’s the truth. I’m hoping the universe delivers on our love story, because you’re the only one I love unconditionally and truthfully, it’s kind of scary. Time is going on and I’m waiting for you, but truth is I’m getting worried it might not be you. Maybe I’m fantasizing about something untrue, but I’ll always keep a place for you in my heart, in case you come back and decide which path is the one for us because I trust you with my soul, and that’s the unconditional truth.

I am in love with the pain in your eyes, it has me regretting all these lies that were enmeshed all over, entangled with power struggles and manipulation, when all I really wanted was honesty and your affection. I know I didn’t show it and my actions weren’t always what I wanted to portray, but it is what I displayed and I’m left alone licking my own wounds until they scar while you’re somewhere far, it’s so bizarre, how we collided once upon a time and now you’re out there while I’m taking lime with my tequila to mask the pain...

I believed for so long that we were meant to be, but I can’t go on thinking it will be, for this hope has me holding onto you and I can’t cope knowing, and not knowing, what you are thinking. Sometimes I reminisce and think about our kiss, fireworks around us while I was your miss, full of love and passionate, you were definitely my favourite. My inspiration and the reason for my poems and ideas, can I get a subpoena and get you to come see me? Is that a possibility? Would you promise me the world like you did before or would you run away to even the score from when you once loved me and I did not, a regret I will not forget...

Through the ups and downs, the happiness, the sadness and the madness, we have failed to make it work. I used to go berserk when things didn’t work in my favour, for I would lurk just to feel close to you... but the time for endings has arrived and deep inside it feels like suicide but I will let it slide for I won’t be defeated or succumb to negativity, and at last go on with my life blissfully, for there is so much to live for and I believe in my core of cores that beautiful things await. For you, for me, and for all; just know I would give my all for one more talk with you, oh the things I would say, I always pray it happens and maybe one day we shall cross paths again, but this pain doesn’t make me want to gain another rendezvous with you, so I’ll just leave it be. You will always be in my heart but this is the part where I say, goodbye.
757 · Feb 2021
Time & energy
Roxana Feb 2021
Energy never dies. It transforms.
We are energy.
This earth is energy.
The universe is all energy, the galaxies, the other universes, all energy.
Energy doesn't die, therefore it isn't born. It has always been here, as has the earth, the stars and the planets.

Time is man-made, but it is so vital to our existence that we plan and do everything that surrounds it, around it.

If you remove the notion of time, you will understand when I say there is no beginning and no ending.
It simply "is".
697 · Feb 2021
Illusions
Roxana Feb 2021
What is water, but a constant fluctuating body of emotions. What is fire, but a loud roar spreading faster than anything known. What is earth, but the very grounding stability needed to live appropriately. What is air, but the very oxygen we need to survive. What are we, but souls on a physical journey, trying to discern what we can and can’t do or say, not realizing the self-imposing rules and habits that ultimately destroy us before the epiphany of life reveals itself, broadcasting the way we have chosen to live. Right or wrong, black or white, this or that... are simply illusions. Do not despair - illusions are made to be shattered.
365 · Feb 2021
Metamorphosis
Roxana Feb 2021
I had to shed the skin I was tightly holding onto, afraid the winter of life would cause my death, but only when I let the knot go and ditched the shell did the summer welcome me with open arms... I am alive again
189 · Feb 2021
Baby steps
Roxana Feb 2021
I follow the flow of the universe within me

We were born to be and to live divinely

Truth respect love and support
I yearn for a closer rapport

With you and with the world out there

Humanity is struggling everywhere

Balancing the aspects of my personality

I do these things to attract higher frequencies
Vibrations and such

It can never be too much

I wonder and I ponder and I explore the mystical
And I truly give it my all

It’s important to set goals and to achieve them all
Because soon it will be my last call

Success is my only option at this point

And I am taking steps towards this joint

Little by little, baby steps

To success I say yes, I accept
171 · Feb 2021
Hi & bye
Roxana Feb 2021
Hi. I miss you. Hi. Where are you. Bye. You left with a chip on your shoulder yet we are getting older and transforming for the better so we could perhaps end up together. Bye, you said and now you are gone. You were my home, but the tone in your voice I could sense wanted more. But not now. I mean, how? Karma is at play here I am no fool, do you think it's cool, to make me so crazy I forget all the rules? Hi. You're back and I'm better than the past learning the hard way I was like okay I get it I know it I feel it I sense it my mind's eye like a sensor going a million miles a minute as I reminisce on us, love or lust?
134 · Feb 2021
Fire
Roxana Feb 2021
As I stare at the dark sky I wonder, where is the moon? It comes back every month, but I still look through the darkness, my old friend, my shadow. You can leave, shadow, I don’t mind. Everything and everyone does eventually. But this isn’t a pity party. This is me, myself and I, reigniting the fire within.
131 · Feb 2021
Honest
Roxana Feb 2021
Dear you
I hope you're doing well
I can't really tell
It's been awhile
That we haven't said hi
Sometimes it makes me want to cry
But tears are for my alone time
Where are you now I wonder
As I stand under the rain and thunder
Perfect place to hide my tears
Like I don't care if it'll be years
But I do
And so do you
Mistakes were made
Misunderstandings like a plague
We are so different
Yet I see what must be learnt
I can't wait for the tables to turn
But this time I'll let the fire burn
So bright, everywhere
And without a care
We will be together I hope in my heart
And it'll be like a piece of art
Cause I love so deeply
And you are really
Very intelligent and wise
I have much to learn from you before the sunrise
But it'll have to wait
Because now there's only hate
On your part anyway
I wish there was a way
For me to open my heart to you
And for you to accept it too
I sense you in the world
Roaming about in your own world
I honestly want you to find happiness
And I will too so I can rest
And we can just vibe together
And actually enjoy the weather
Between us
Love or lust
Look I just miss you so much
But I'm not in a rush
The ball is in your court
I said what I had to say on this route
It's time to move on
But how do I live on
When I feel you in my heart?
When I hope for you to feel the same?
I don't even mind if we are just friends
As long as you're in my life
Honest
109 · Feb 2021
Sorry
Roxana Feb 2021
Here I sit day dreaming

Wondering

If I'll get a millionth chance

But I don't think things will change
We were intoxicated

But I really thought we'd make it

Although it wasn't really me

And it wasn't really you

I know you might not love me

But I pray for you peacefully

I know you are strong

I hope you remember that

I know I was wrong

I took advantage of you

I didn't see what I had

And the potential that could be had

I'm so sorry
98 · Feb 2021
Future
Roxana Feb 2021
The moments that pass me by

The way I try not to lie

Honesty in its purest form

To everyone, it should be the norm

Who do you cry to

When life makes you do you

Ever changing work in progress

This life is just a test

Deeply in my soul

I feel the currents splashing

This world is so cold

People fighting and smashing

Each other down

In every town

The violence is everywhere

Yet no one seems to care

In their safe little bubble

Not sensing the trouble

Change is on the way

Listen to your soul to understand the way

To go

To flow

To fly
Roxana Feb 2021
Has your anger overtaken your sadness? The nest we built when I didn’t know you were the one? The click in our eyes and the stirring of our souls as one; it was love. Unfortunately, sometimes, it’s not enough. The love we made, the secrets we shared. I was your confidante and you were my favorite person. Why didn’t I see it? Why didn’t I grab you? Why did I simply dilly dally around, ignorant to the fact you were in love with me. Why didn’t I love you back? So many regrets, it breaks my heart. PUSH FORWARD they say. But without you, nothing is worth it.
86 · Feb 2021
Just a little something
Roxana Feb 2021
The art oozing from your heart attracts me so lovingly to play my part in this harmony we call love.
When someone tells you who they are choose wisely because conniving trickery is below and above.
I press my cheek against the window to feel a breeze coming from the meadow I’m feeling good and a little mellow every day I suddenly grow.
Back to back we cannot see the eyes are the answers that we seek like the Phoenix with its beak more power to you if you succeed.
Energy transforms the whole because it is everything so don’t think too much about such and such for the one in between sees it all.
83 · Feb 2021
Cupid’s aim
Roxana Feb 2021
We are so young

We are too old

Never learned the right lessons

Now we are filled with questions

Life and death

Reincarnation

We can't see it

But we can feel it

To love oh so deeply

To understand each other telepathically

That connection I crave

I'm fearful that I'll cave

And settle down wrongfully

Without feeling the bliss of loving an entity

I have so much love to give

Please just look into my eyes

I promise I won't lie

I'll show you my soul

I'll bare it all
For you

— The End —