These rooms are getting smaller
without you.
These tired bones ache in
your absence.

You are missing, from me

It's almost five a.m. and
I'm staring at the walls again,
thinking of all the women
and their parts.
Their missing parts and
the chunks they ripped
from me.

Some took more than I could give
and knowing this didn't make
the bleeding any easier.
Pushing boundaries becomes a bore;
I know how far I will go.

I saw the weathered metal chairs
on your porch, the same kind my grandmother had in her back yard,
as I drove near your house today.

I remembered our brief kiss, on those chairs. The electric shudder rippling through my entire being as your lips parted and for one sweet, fleeting moment, I felt loved.

It's five a.m. now and I'll die again today,
without you.

Last time you told me that the sun shines,
Even when clouds cover the blue.
But how can this be so?

Last time you told me that tears were salty,
Because they came from the sea.
But how can this be so?

Last time you showed me that every day starts,
With a sunrise, and ends with a sunset.
But how can this be so?

Last time you told me that happiness is,
In everyone’s heart despite the darkness.
But how is this so?

Last time you told me there was a *** of love,
At the end of the rainbow.
But how could this be so?

Last time it rained, you remarked that it was,
Tears from heaven weeping for lost.
But how could this be so?

Last time it snowed, you told me,
It was angel’s feathers falling from heaven.
But how could this be so?

Last time you told me kisses were,
Like a little taste of heaven.
But how could this be so?

Last time you told me the stars,
Were kisses blown towards the moon.
But why would this be so?

Last time you told me catching sunbeams,
Protected you from the night.
But why would this be so?

Last time you told me the moon, cast a shadow.
You said it was time to dance beneath the sky.
But why would this be so?

Last time you gave me your heart, you said,
Fasten it with a button to your own.
This I understood.  X

© Nick Strong 2014

These days, I feel like time is moving too fast for me. Too dang fast.
Everybody comes and goes out of my life, Always.
without the blink of an eye. You included
Break those promises wont you? You said you'd never do that. Look at what's happened now

Maybe I should stop caring. Just let it all fade away. It'll be Peaceful maybe
I did try didn't I? I kept trying. I still am trying. It's really hard.
If this doesn't work, what will? I want you to stay but I'll have to let you go
Will you ever realize how much you're hurting me? As long as you're happy I guess.
You don't even know any of this. And I wont tell you either.

I wish I was strong enough to throw a fit and scream and yell I wanna let go.
but no sounds come out of my mouth when I try. Why is this happening?
So instead of going through all that trouble, "It'll get better."
I just put up a smile on my face, try to make it seem genuine, "It'll be okay."
and walk around with that fake smile. *You lie.