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 Apr 2019 Aubrey
Lily X
I didn't want you,
I wanted love
and I have realised
that they are not the same thing.

You were a mould
that I poured my insecurities in,
a computer I tried to program.

But you are a sky,
stormy and clear and rainy and warm.

You were so blue when I longed for red.

I didn't want you.
I wanted the thought.
 Apr 2019 Aubrey
Pink Halverson
I want to move forward
so badly
but all this time
a spire
has stood in our way.
I love you as hard
as I could imagine
loving anyone
but still
it's not enough.

I am not allowed to live with you
because they would disagree.
And
we cannot
get married
because you are not free.

You say that you're sorry
and I surely believe you
but
it doesn't change things.

I still sleep
                      alone.
And we lie
                      perfectly.

I don't want to live this way.

I cannot keep doing this.

I need to
escape
escape
escape
escape
 Apr 2019 Aubrey
idunnome
What's it like to feel wanted?
i could have told you before
but i can't recall anymore
 Apr 2019 Aubrey
Tark Wain
The man I'll one day meet
won't be handsome, at least not to you
if he were an apple on a shelf,
he'd be the last one you'd choose,
bruised on the outside, yes
but that makes the inside sweeter
the one no one wanted
the middle of a 5 seater

The man I'll one day meet
I can see him when I sleep
sometimes will get coffee
and he'll ask me...
about me,
like he cares, like he's there
like even if I haven't met him yet
we're not wasting time

The man I'll one day meet
will make it all worth
all the heartbreak, all the anger
all the sadness, all the misplaced joy
The man I'll one day meet
is somewhere, right now,
thinking about me.
And I can't wait to tell him I'm doing the same
 Apr 2019 Aubrey
Alex
Broken
 Apr 2019 Aubrey
Alex
I am broken
I've finally snapped
What was holding me together
Is almost gone
Though I thought it may stick forever
I am broken
I feel the pain
My past thoughts have become vain
The way I feel, is considered
Inconsiderate
The way I act, is that of a broken man
This was not my plan
To be in agony
I don't want to deal with it angrily
I feel trapped by the gravity
In this hell ridden galaxy
I start to see the vanity
Of this reality
My anger and insanity
My depression and my humanity
It's all been revealed
I may never be healed
I am broken
My words are now outspoken.
 Apr 2019 Aubrey
october rose
E.
 Apr 2019 Aubrey
october rose
E.
I break my own heart
Dreaming of the things
Unrealistically
 Apr 2019 Aubrey
Eyla
A confession.
 Apr 2019 Aubrey
Eyla
most people see me as
a happy person because
i laugh easily,
i smile a lot,
i joke a lot.

but deep down
in my heart,
i am fragile,
i can get hurt easily,
but i choose to not
show it to the world.

instead of being sad,
i choose to laugh to cover it.
maybe you can call me
"the queen of the mask"

by this,
you can tell
that most of the time
when I'm laughing,
I'm not really laughing,
i was trying so hard to hide
my sadness.
 Apr 2019 Aubrey
MyPain
Three Words
 Apr 2019 Aubrey
MyPain
Luscious lips and beautiful eyes
With silky skin and lovers’ thighs
Wrap your arms around me and whisper in my ear
Three words I need to hear to release me from my fear
“I need you” to keep me near
“I want you” to make me veer
“I love you” to make us we’re
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