My mind is Wonderland
A place were nothing makes sense
Where I slay a Jabberwocky made up of bad thoughts
The Red Queen is my self-doubt
Who shouts "Off with their heads" to every solider of self-confidence who arises
The Mad Hatter my own madness
Where I shrink so I can't be seen
Or grow to outshine everyone else
Where I paint roses red with my own blood
Where everyone and everything is c
Crazy
And it’s easy to forget the path you had once chosen
Were the Cheshire cat is who inspires me to smile on cue
I can't imagine anyone but myself
Surviving in my mind
For they are not me
And who could survive wonderland other than Alice herself

The curtains closed
and the stage became a cavern
Darkness hid jagged edges
with burned out spotlights
While exit doors
were neither right or left
and only the faint applause
of the audience
in the theater next door
reminded him,
how alone
he really was

My anger is my nuclear fallout
It's what is killing me and choking me out
It's not only sabotaging who I am
But all those around me have faced the slam

The concussion blast of this vicious mood
Unable to control myself, only to know I'm *******
I can only sit and watch like a movie on display
What actions I take and the horrific things I say

These words reach out to those I have wronged
To those situations I only prolonged
These words are not a justification
These words are for you to have relation

This is my apology for what I could not control
I have gotten better and will never let this take me whole.