My head is spinning,
I want you happy sadly
It means I won't be.

Do you love me?

It's been less than a year
Since I met you here.
I didn’t know you well
But well enough to know
That I loved you.

Yes, you’ve broken my heart
But I want to give you another chance
To fix it.
I still have those old stitches
But when you pull them away
It will be a new slate
Fresh with no pain.

Love me back or not
At least I know I fought.
I fought a war to gain your love
And though I may have lost
It was at no cost.

Only a few more stitches

today we decided to bake a cake.

it was my idea really,
you said you were the expert,
but i wanted to help.

i poured water and oil
while you cracked eggs,
then i stirred and stirred
until you poured it in the pans.
you placed them in the oven
that i avoided
because it is my greatest
fear.

we waited until they were done
we waited until they cooled
so that we could decorate.

again you took charge,
but i didn't mind
because i could've watched you all day,
taking your time-
so delicate, fragile, gentle.

your handwriting is beautiful
and you wouldn't let me write,
so i chose to respond
with a frosting fight.

we chased each other in circles,
in circles we chased each other.

you grabbed my wrist
(if only you decided
to interlock our fingers,
i wouldn't have minded).

so i grabbed your wrist
and we danced around-
our feet were pound (ing)
frosting hit the ground
we laughed with a joyous sound
and then you found...

the perfect opportunity.
you smeared it in my,
face
nose
hair
clothes,
so i chased you up the stairs
and you tried restraining me,
i chased you down the stairs
and you helped me see,
that we had no time left
for fun,
we had to finish the cake
we begun.

so i grabbed the sprinkles,
you caught the ones that fell;
i handed you the candles,
frantically listening for the door bell.

it came too soon
we had to hurry put everything in random places act like everything was normal
because the cake was a surprise.

later we finished,
you lit the cake,
it was truly beautiful,
what we can make,
when we work together.

And suddenly my mood drops,
that feeling of wholeness and content vanishes and leaves behind it no trace, as if it was never there.
The void widens and my chest aches,
crawling up through my ribs and spreading across each inch of my flesh and skin until I feel consumed with
e
m
  p
   t
    i
     n
      e
       s
        s
My mind blanks and swirls and gets lost in itself as I try to distract myself from the nothingness that feels as if it is living inside me like a disease,
an incurable illness just waiting to destroy me and as I breathe in
my lungs expand and I become painfully aware of my own fragile
mortality.

For those who say life’s easy, they obviously haven’t tried,
For those who found it difficult, some of whom have died.

For those who are still struggling, don’t hold your head in shame,
No one said life was easy; you’re not the one to blame.

Those dark days may be difficult, but know that they will end,
Look for the brighter future around life’s winding bend
.
What troubles you today, will be a breeze tomorrow,
Don’t make the harsh decision and leaves other to face sorrow.

To know that you are loved and that they all do care,
Will lift weight from your shoulders, no more a load to bear.

Now talk about your troubles and share your problems open,
It’s not a sign of weakness; it simply shows your copin.

Sometimes life’s problems exceed us, they can be overcome.
You may have lost the battle, but the war will soon be won.

Now stand up proud while smiling and know that life is brighter.
They say god loves a trier, he also loves a fighter

So if you see a friend whose load they cannot bear,
just reach out your hand to them to show how much you care.

That one simple gesture can re inspire hope
and help someone who’s struggling to make them better cope