I’m great, fine, spectacular
In a way I relish every night and I live every day.
I live, I laugh, I write, I sing.
I wonder what the new days will bring.
Then I get home,
And almost impossible task,
Is finally over,
And so I lie down and wait patiently for the day
That I die.
I cry, I scream, I bowl and sleep,
Even though I have promises to keep
I wait, and wonder, and cry some more
And I ache and burn from my every core.
Then, I’m not alone and the mask reappears:
Out goes the grief, pain and all the tears.
As I am a happy person,
Cheerful all the day
A world full of rainbows,
Not one shade of grey
Of course I’m not okay
I’m not fine
No matter how much I seem to shine
I don’t even know why I feel this
Why my existence is one long, endless abyss
But it is, and will be, so I cling to life,
As one day I might slip
And end with a knife.
But, I’m still here
No matter what my dreams may say
And I hope that one day
I will actually be okay.