You once longed for that feeling
Now you have it

You once dreamed of the rosy side
Now you've passed it

You once felt alone
Now you have that person

You once thought of solving issues
Now you don't have control

You once thought you had everything
Now you do

You once said everything was nothing
Now you feel it

You once promised you'll be there
Now you can't keep it

You once wanted to restart
Now you can't change what's happened

What are broken hearts
        ... but souls who dared

i was sitting drunk alone in a yellow flannel on a dirt
and patch grass hill beside an empty picnic table when
you sat down said hi my name is sam and i'm tripping face
that was no secret judging by the size of your pupils and smile
i asked to borrow a layer from your lip-gloss and
you happily obliged after verifying i had my circle-circle-dot-dot

you laughed hard and said you'd never been this high before
when you let me finger you on the ferris wheel with
the scene from the hill a distant seven minutes in our past
you watched with tears in your eyes
and smiled as i pulled my body
away from your candy thighs when the ride stopped
and stuck my sticky fingers back in my mouth

you said you listened to music better with your shirt off
and sure enough your ******* perked up like antennae
when my fingers slipped under
your half-shirt like an innocuous splinter
in the great pink epidermal amphitheater
you proved to be a nudist burlesque queen wearing
a hailstone necklace and a gold coin skirt that jingled
when you walked or skipped or rubbed your *** on me

i felt so immediately attracted to you
and i still do i can see you when i close my eyes
dancing free in a delicate psychotropic mushroom haze
whispering slap me silly as we walked hand in hand down the hill
you kept talking about your girlfriend being jealous
of my fatal blue eyes as the music drifted like breath
between us your hair was heavy with the smell
of mushrooms beer sage and rain

we took several overpriced shots of tequila and i lost
another six dollars in drink tickets when
we spent a whole dj set lying in the grass in the dark
with the lights from the stage spraying over
our heaving naked sweaty chests with my
hand in your gold net skirt and your tongue in my ear
the clouds were knotted ropes of wet white cotton
the sky became the sea and your fingers found my
feverish lips like a cool prayer

i looked up through the oak tree porthole
to find the strangulated sky
whirling in on itself like water
in a washing machine and i
let a dolphin carry me away out to where
the waves were boiling and wild
the stars salty and deep

cuddling as night falls
venus on the horizon
celestial love

So this is why they call it
falling
you're looking at the view and then you're hit
Cupid's arrow pushed me off as I'm calling
your name.
It's like a song on my tongue
and nothing else will be the same
and even though I am so young
and nothing could ever happen between
you and me.
I fall anyways, a broken young teen
who can only see what she wants to be
and the one who could love her
if only he'd try,
And even though she is sure
She still wants to cry
because out of all of the boys in the whole wide world
she wants the foul-mouthed boy
yeah, she wants to be his girl.
It's funny how someone who gives me so much joy
can also cause me so much pain
in the heart, in the chest
on the lips, in the brain.
Why couldn't I want the best?
when you aren't near,
I can talk myself out.
You're an ******, dear
and you do like to shout.
Yet my brain finds you endearing
and I know I can't stop
even though you can't be hearing
these words, my heart seems to pop
out of my rib cage when you're here.
Everything else goes away
and even if your intentions are unclear,
somehow that is a-okay.
My whole being manages to see
every little detail of you
somehow liking me.
And that's how I know my eyes are untrue
Because even if I'm somehow deluded
by the ******* jacket and big brown eyes,
there's a place in your heart where I'm not included
just because I have such a good disguise
So in the end, I can't love you
it's like swimming with a 140 pound brick
yet, I still do
even though it makes my logic sick.
And as I drown in my emotions,
sinking down with a smile.
As I drown in that ocean,
I hope to see you in a while.