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they see your light
luminescent and burning with pale shades of pink and orange
they love to bask in its warm glow
but they could never sustain it so far

silly girl, always mistaking her own reflection as another's glow
when will you ever learn?

perhaps when your whole world is dim enough
and all the mirrors have fogged up
you will trace that sliver of light
on your own fingertips
in the iris of your eyes

painful, but necessary for you to finally realise
you are what you seek in everything.
23 was a year of losing people and things and learning new paradigms, I wished for some moments to end but in the end I found something better than rubies and diamonds.
Thinking

I’m always thinking about

Every word you say
To me

I scrutinize, dissect, gut

Every word you say
To me

I’m thinking that maybe
I’m over-thinking

Every word you say
To me

Maybe I need

To
Just
Silence
your
voice.
Heartfelt and true. Thanks for listening. Whose voice is it? Probably mine.
arcane chummy chaotic voice
never cut short at the vowel
but where apt is there

Ideas like swans,
their stillness just
an illusion

As they paddle
beneath
the surface of the water

Just as I float by listening to this song
I based this writing on.
This piece of writing is not meant to have a sense of irony, but one of a lifted mood or sprit, where everything else feels hopeless and youv'e lost all hope of recognising why, or how, or when (maybe just a glance of when) evil they are. These so called human beings around you. How behind them you are ain the times. ow they control our brains, bodies, and even pregnancies.


the idea of stillness as an illusion metaphoricaly demonstrates the swans apparantley non-being, as they are described only as ideas.
This question therefore arises, where do we seek solace from illusions?
When  the first stanza explains that the song she's heard so many times, is a song that she loves, but now, like anything, can't give her back her spirit. As represented in the words she uses to describe it's familiarity.
So far as I see things today,
You cannot have a policy
Centered on ambiguity
And expect people
To take you at your word!
Even take you as being serious!

Seriously, you guys! Seriously!
There's a monster on the way!
To borrow from an absurdist, comedic series.

Yet, the point was lost anyways!
But, of course, that was about climate change...
Or maybe it was about listening to experts...
Or maybe it was about acting rather than reacting...
Or maybe...
The Lord,
My Lord,
The Lord,
My God,
God God,
G…O…D,
God God.
IS All,
God,
IS,
Every,
Day,
Every,
Thing!
The Lord!
My Lord!
SPS
It's time I tell you.
Things you suspect or least took a guest at.
I love you through all the non-sense.
Through all the arguments.

I love you through your quietness.
Well, now you know.

I can handle your rudeness.
Least to a point.
Even during that time of the month.
You got what I want.
You got what I need.
Well, now you know.

But this man loves you more.
Whenever your eyes flow.
I saw you on a picture.
—And for a split moment,
I didn’t recognise my brain.
I programmed it differently.
For that specific task,
it’s usually set
to unpair itself
from my higher conscious self.

My standard policy is:
No empathy your way.

But today…
I could tell.
You seemed unwell.

Despite the damages done,
under your affection dictatorship
I didn’t rejoice.
I actually cared.

No trace of a mean smirk.
really wished you the best.

Hope it reaches you,
written all over your face,
Next time I catch a glimpse
In some picture of a friend.
Perfectionism is so far away from reality.
Embracing this moment is more than enough.
Recognizing the sneaky perfectionist patterns and returning to gratitude and enoughness again and again.
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